today had not gone the smoothest. my period arrived the night before, so i woke up feeling like shit which was a perfect way to start off the day. the mood swings were off the rocker as usual and i was starving. no food had been touched yet today because i felt so miserable. but now i was ravenous. not finding anything remotely enticing in the downstairs pantry, i convinced my boyfriend, a very loving and patient matt, to go pick up some food for me.
even though i was miserable, in pain, and bleeding, i couldn't help but feel a little guilty at how much i put matt through when it was that time of the month. he insisted none of it was a bother to him, even my crazy ride of emotions. but i still felt like i treated him rather poorly when he couldn't act more kind and patient towards me.
i was currently sat in bed in my apartment, reading a book as i waited, not so patiently, for the man to return. the hours felt like they were dragging by. i just wanted a snack and my boyfriend to cuddle up against. it wouldn't take my misery away but it could greatly improve the situation.
needing to use the restroom, i put my book down and hobbled over to the bathroom. once i had finished i began making my way back to the bed. but my stomach started to twist and stab. it felt like someone had begun shoving a knife in my abdomen. electrocuting shocks zipped down my inner thighs. my body halted halfway across the bedroom floor.
stumbling forward slightly, my upper half hunched over.
"ow," a quiet sob escaped my lips, tears threatening to break through.
my knees began to buckle under the piercing pain and pressure. the room started to swirl, dim light from the bedside lamp flashing in my vision. soon my bed became a hazy blob and i felt my body go limp.
a sharp gasp involuntarily piped from my throat as i felt strong arms wrap around my waist.
my back collided with a hard chest. a familiar dry woodsy smell filled my lungs. "love, what's wrong?" sweet words whispered into the skin of my neck. my flesh tingled at the warmth of the breath.
matt.
he was back home. i hadn't heard him enter the apartment or even open my bedroom door. my pain was drowning me.
"my cramps are so bad," i let out a sob.
large warm hands slowly glided under the hem of my shirt. heat from his palms seeped through my skin, dulling the sharp blades twisting in my stomach. matt gently but firmly added pressure to my lower abdomen. the movement pressed me impossibly close to his chest, supporting me upright. butterflies managed to outdo the pain as they fluttered over the cramping and tickled my stomach.
"i'm so sorry baby," he hummed.
his hands slid down a hair, the tips of his pinkies and ring fingers slipping just under the waistband of my sweatpants grazing over my underwear. with the new pressure applied, i quietly sighed, matt's warm secure hands quickly easing the excruciating pain.
"why don't we lay down, love. you take some painkillers and we can cuddle and watch a movie," matt softly whispered into my ear.
"okay," i murmured.
without another word he removed his hands from my stomach. i bit back a groan at the sharpness in my abdomen swiftly returning. but he quickly scooped me up in his arms bridle style and walked towards my bed.
softly lowering me onto the rumpled sheets, matt hurried into the bathroom across the room. i tried my hardest to wait patiently as i heard him rummage through the cabinet for medicine.
after half a minute he returned with a pill and a glass of water. "here sweetheart, take this." sitting down on the edge of the bed, matt helped me sit up and placed the pill in my open palm. after popping it in my mouth he brought the cup up toward my lips so i could drink.
"i'm hungry," i mumbled after matt placed the empty glass on the nightstand.
"well you're in luck, i picked up some fast food," he said as he grabbed a couple bags packed with stuff. "i bought your favorite candy too, couldn't forget that," he laughed softly.
"thank you baby." i reached out to squeeze his hand.
"anything for you," he said sweetly, pulling out wrapped up burgers.
"no seriously, thank you. you have to deal with my stupid shit," i insisted, brushing my fingers along his exposed tattoos as he hovered above me, holding out food for me to take.
"love that's what i'm here for, i never get tired of taking care of you." his incredibly blue puppy eyes locked onto mine. soft wisps of chocolate curls cascaded onto his forehead as he leaned down slightly to look at me sitting cross legged on the bed below his towering figure.
"i love you," i whisper, squeezing his forearm.
tilting my chin up slightly, matt leaned down placing a delicate kiss on my forehead. "i love you more," he mumbled into my skin.
slumping down onto the bed beside me, he placed the food i had not taken yet into my lap. "eat before it gets cold," he laughed before taking a big chomp into his burger.
giggling i quickly uncovered my food desperate to devour it. i was so hungry by now that i could have eaten just about anything.
after finishing up our meal, i turned on a movie and burrowed myself under the blankets. matt was quick to follow. cozying up under the covers, matt's searching hands quickly found my waist and pulled me into him. i squealed at the sudden movement, suddenly face to face with his clothed chest. inhaling the delicious scent of him, i cuddled closer, wrapping my arms around his waist.
we layed in silence. the only noise filling the air was the movie playing and the distant noise of traffic in the background. matt craddled my head against his chest as he gently brushed his fingers through my hair.
as the minutes ticked by i attempted to block out the continuous piercing pain jabbing at my lower stomach. i was in a comfortable position in matt's arms and i could feel his breathing slowing, he was falling asleep. i didn't want to move. but against my will, i flinched as a sudden sharp wave of stabbing sliced at my gut. arms fell loose around my body. matt slightly propped himself up over me, worry etched across his pretty features.
"i'm sorry, you were almost asleep." i choked back the lump in my throat.
"hey shh, that's ok," matt soothed. "come here."
he gently twisted me around in his arms so my back was pressed into him. hot breath tickled the exposed skin on my neck as he lowered himself back down behind me, pulling my waist against him. hands slithered over my torso as they buried themselves downward. matt's palms pressed down firmly over my burning flesh, fingertips resting under the hem of my underwear.
all the ache building up in my abdomen began to release. it disappeared into matt's large hands as if they were meant to soak up every drop of pain.
and that was all i needed, matt was all i needed in order to calm down enough to drift into a peaceful slumber.
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