BABY (niccolò rossi)

INTRODUZIONE

Starting over? There's no such thing. As much as you try to push away or hide those unwanted feelings and memories...

You cannot.

They will always be apart of you and they will always haunt you.

I knew sooner or later I was going to learn this hard way. Yet I still tried fooling myself. I tried fooling myself into believing this would work. Starting over. Fresh start. New chances.

I live with regrets. People I wish I never met. Places I wish I never went. Things I just wish I never did. Everything I cannot change. Choices I can never take back.

I wanted to escape.

I wanted to escape so badly I would live with my mother and start a new life.

"A new life"

Because no matter how hard you try to run from who you really are, true colors show eventually.

~

"Tu es sûr de vouloir ça ?" (You're sure this is what you want?) Papa asks me with furrowed eyebrows. He has a concerned look on his face. I knew he was worried about me. He has been for weeks. I don't blame him.

"Ouais papa, je peux pas plus vivre ici... c'est trop," (Yes dad, I can't live here anymore... it's too much,) I look at him sadly. I feel the tears about to form. It's all I do now. Whenever I think of her. And whenever I think of him.

All I can do is think about them. And think about how they changed my life. For the better and for the worse.

Everything around me reminds me of them. It feels suffocating. I just want a moment of peace where I feel like I don't have to think about them and I can breathe.

" J'suis désolé mon amour," (I'm sorry my love) Papa says as he comes closer to me, embracing me in a hug. He kisses the top of my forehead and rubs my back. I can feel my tears falling down uncontrollably.

He then whispers "Je sais que c'est difficile sans eux," (I know that it's hard without them)
I rest my head against his chest as I sob.

This is the last time I'll ever let myself feel this way.

As long as I have the pills to help me feel not feel this way.