i'm not leaving

1.1 say the word

Buzz. Buzz.
Buzz. Buzz.
03:52 was the sight Alex saw when he manoeuvred the clock to the face. The marron light pierced his eyes, evoking him to swiftly find the source of the sound. He carefully gets out of bed and stumbled around the room to Henry's side to turn off the less than welcome sound that was illuminating their room. Henry's phone he retorts under his breath. Turning it over he sees an name that almost immediately turns his meek laughter into vivid repulsion. Phillip. Before he's given the pleasure to press the red button, timed just as the voicemail chimes in, Henry awakes - motioning for the phone. Wiping his eyes, without hesitation, he gets up & answers.

Henry and his brother Phillips relationship has never been the most amicable - with his brother making loud opposition to all but his existence, it's reasonable to say that when Alex saw this happen in front of him, he was more than a little bewildered.

Tired too, he follows the light to where Henry has situated himself - on the kitchen counter, cross legged. Before getting on the lower floor landing, Alex pauses, quietly eavesdropping the unexpected late night call. However in the space of typical animosity was Henry's words merge into mumbles for a while until - 'I'll be there in the morning'
His face reflecting his mental processing of the situation, Alex hastily approches his boyfriend, querying the reasoning of the call.
Henry, dismantling from the countertop, moves his eyes frantically around, almost as if they were planning his next moves before he thought of it. He clings onto the edge of the table, almost as a lifeline.
Cautiously, Alex reaches out
'Hey, what's up?'
With no reply, his palm bristles Henry's jaw, lifting it to his gaze. His brown eyes meet the pink haze of his partners - glossy but not saturated. He's holding something back.
Alex's grip gets softer and he closens in. In response, Henrys breath slows, and his eyes begin pacing themselves.
'Martha...' with a glance up, gave all the conclusion needed
Despite the notable shortcoming of her choice to wed, Martha was nice to the couple. On her tour the year prior to Royal affiliated institues in the northern states, she found her way to Alex & Henry's brownstone - staying for a couple nights. In the mornings, Alex snuck her into his lectures and they were couped at the back, playing cards on one of the more taxing topics. During the evenings, she got to know Henry better - with them watching the 5 most recent Star Wars movies and his opinion 'most important' but he left out that detail when Alex with the millions of British snacks Martha brought them. She was beginning to mean something to the pair. And it's always the freshest cuts that sting the most.
'I have to-' he exhales, bending an eye at his partner '
'I should go'

Alex, processing the whole affair, eventually adds
'Do you want to talk'
Henry turns slightly before his flight up the stairs 'Honestly...not sure I know what to say'.
And like that, Henry walked up the stairs, Alex following suit. The creaks on the boards buckled the silence. He held the door ajar for him, like he always did, this time not looking back. Felt almost like he couldn't. Alex flicked on their lamps & lay upright on the bed frame. Feet tucked into himself, he watched his boyfriend's leaving. Henry packed his carryon and was grabbing his jacket for the cloak room down the hall before Alex hanging from their door, shook his head and said
'Can we talk about this'
Henry blinks, almost realising the gravity of the situation
'He needs me'
And that was all the confirmation Alex needed.

Before long, they were on the pavement outside their house, rocking to the frosty ebbs of the winter air in each others arms.
Alex, in an oversized tee & joggers, wraps himself under the warmth of Hen's coat. He didn't want to forget this, if- . Pulling away he tethers 'I'll go anywhere with you' He reaches Hen's hands, breaking the space between them 'Say the word'
Almost as though the frosty climate just hit him, Henry twitches. Then, squeezes Alex lightly,

'Think this is something I have to do' he chokes 'On my own'

Drop. Drop. Tears - a estranged concept to the pair whom before this, were everything that came to mind from the word 'happy'. Alex tilts his head, levelling out the above average water leakage coming from his eyes. He looks to the one he loves, the one he needs most, the one who can't look at him . Alex hums under his breath, creating a little cloud of smoke under the February skies. Quietly, he says:
'Know that I'll be there if you call.'
Almost unresponsive, Henry adjusts his head side to side, breaking the crack that had emerged in their love, adds: 'I know'

Henry lowers his head & jumps into the blackout SUV Cash arranged - he himself sitting on the house in his own monster of a vehicle.
'I love you' Alex says, but the doors had already slammed, the cars gone, and he was left standing on the sidewalk, alone.

authors note : inspired by 'say the word' - Joshua Bassett