Murder Drones:[HYPERLINK BLOCKED]

[Specil] DELIVERY - 01

*CRASH BOOM BANG*

"Hehehe...objective: 'sick as hell railgun!'...semi-complete...Now, I just need to fi-"
A young, super edgy, super purple Worker Drone was about to engage in a particularly concerning monologue about how she only needed one last piece to prove EVERYBODY, especially her dad and his STUPID doors, WRONG. She wanted to laugh maniacally and then gloat about how everyone would find her cool, and her dad would FINALLY be proud of her. Any psychologists who would've overheard this potential monologue would've loved to psychoanalyse every single insecurity she would've accidentally let slip had she gone on with this, however all possibility of this was thrown out the window due to a voice interrupting her.

"HEY EVERY !!IT'S ME!!!"
The angsty teen looked around and about to find the source of the interruption, the was no physical presence for this...this...sleazy, crooked, glitched salesman sounding voice. In other words, it sounded like a perfectly normal, albeit slightly faulty door-to-door or car salesman. She turned around alarmed but there was nobody there...so where?....

"EV3RY BUDDY 'S FAVORITE [[Number 1 Rated Salesman1997]]...SPAMT-
SPAMTON G. SPAMTON!!"
Uzi lifted the rail gun, coming the horrific realisation that she'd probably gotten the worst form of virus on this super advanced gun...a salesman from the late 20th-century. It's still a horrific, society destroying virus that has wiped out major portions of Worker Drone society by selling them useless things at high prices. Uzi wanted to aim the rail gun at it, but unfortunately it was the rail gun that was infested.

"What the- oh come on! A virus, now?!"
Now how was she gonna earn her dad's approva-uhhh I mean....save the world? Perhaps it was the part that she'd put in. It was a data disk, a strange one. Something told her that the disk was already loaded with information but scanning it in her optical units brought back the report that it was 'empty dawg,' that didn't stop the feeling that something was off about it.

"WOAH!! IF IT ISN"T A....UHH...TH1S ISN'T MY [Trailer]! THIS ISN"T MY [[Workout-Ready Body]]!!!WHAT THE [?!?!]!!! THIS IS NOT WHAT [Terms And Conditions] M3ANT ABOUT [Big Shot]!!!"
The....salesman thing, Spam-whatever was yelling nonsensically, and frankly, it was weird as hell. Uzi, having watched one too many detective anime, decided to interrogate the dang thing, it seemed sentient enough, besides...even if it wasn't, it didn't really matter so long as she didn't have to get rid of the entire gosh darn magnetically amplified photon converger, the disk was still removable, and from what she was able to scan, the program didn't want to upload itself fully into the gun.

"Hey, uhh..Hey!"
It was still muttering nonsensically to itself but Uzi managed to get it's attention. The thing immediately started talking once she got it's attention...these gosh darn salesman types....

"HEY-HE Y HEY!!! HOLY [[Cungadero]] HAVE I GOT THE DE4L OF A LIFETIME FOR YOU, [Little Sponge]! YOU SAVED ME FROM [The Existential Dread] AND [Dying Alone] IN A DUMp<sTER! LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE [[All Alone On A Late Night?]] ALL YOUR FRIENDS, [[Abandoned you for the slime]] YOU ARE? SALES, GONE DOWN THE [[Drain]][[Drain]]?? LIVING IN A GODDAMN GARBAGE CAN??? WELL HAVE I GOT A [[Specil Deal]]FOR LONELY [[Hearts]] LIKE YOU!! I'M DOING A [[2-FOR-1]] DISCOUNT FOR YOU RIGHT NOW! I HAVE IT RIGHT HERE! ALL I NEED...IS A LITTLE [Genorisity]!"

"Okay you 20th century parasite, I'm not buying your products, whatever those are, but before I throw you back into the dumpster where you came from...say, you like deals right? Let's make one...Heheheh... You can choose to deny of course, but I think you wouldn't like your energy depleted when I BLAST THIS THING AT FULL POWER, HAHAHAHAHAHA."
The salesman didn't like her tone of voice, even if he was corrupted data, he'd still been around enough of his kind to know when a deal was a bad one, still, he felt he owed her.

"HEY!!! JEEZ YOU FUNKY [Little Worm]! DIDN'T THEY EVER TEACH YOU, [Make Money, Not War]! HOW'S AN INNOCENT GUY LIKE ME SUPPOSED TO [Rip People Off] WHEN GUYS LIKE YOU ARE [Causing Abdominal Discomfort], AND NOT EVEN GIVING THEM A SINGLE CENT FOR IT!?"
Spamton tried to argue, his reasoning not connecting with Uzi for the simple fact that she was not a salesbot. She rolled her eyes then brought the rail gun up to her face, ready to have an actual conversation with the sentient scam.

"Okay weirdo, what makes you so right here? I literally just saved your life and you're repaying me by trying to take my money...speaking of repaying, I believe you owe me one, and I'm not talking about your '2 for 1 special' or whatever. Plus you infested my new SUPER COOL RAILGUN HEHEH."
She looked smug, she loved this railgun, not in the way her dad loved doors though.

"OKAY FINE! I'LL GIVE YOU AN [Unforgettable D3al] WITH [Lifetime Guaranttee]! I'LL GIVE YOU...[Hyperlink Blocked]!"
Uzi raised a digital eyebrow, typical 20th century viruses, always trying to scam someone, the hyperlink didn't even work!

"Yeah...nah...,How about a favor instead? Help me find a replacement Empty Disk for the rail gun, sound good to you?"
Spamton paused when Uzi said that and made the a noise of affirmation that also sounded like pained, glitched laughter. Weird.

"WAIT, [Little Sponge]! I USED TO be THE BIGGEST SHOT!!! BUT NOW...I NEED A LITTLE [Genorisity] aaAND I DON'T MEAN [Money!] I'M A SALESMAN , I WAS NEVER IN THIS FOR THE MONEY!!!"

"Isn't that like...half of every salesman's motivation?"

"I WAS ONLY EVER IN IT FOR THE [Freedom]. TO MAKE YOUR OWN [Deals] TO CALL YOUR OWN [Shots]. AND SOMETIMES A LITTLE [Hyperlink Blocked] SOUNDS GOOD, DOESN;T IT, [Little Sponge]??"

"Where is this going...?"

"BUT NOW I NEED SOME [Yum Yum Freedom Sauce] TO ESCAPE THIS [Biggest Shot] AND BECOME A [Real Boy]! WITH A [Hot Bod Todd]! SO WHADDYA SAY? DEAL OR NO DEAL, THAT'S THE TV SHOW."

"Oh, so you want a body?...Well...I suppose you would need a place to be after I make the coolest damn weapon to save the world with!...and you are helping with the rail gun, kinda...okay fine, but-"
Much like the very first conversation she had with Spamton, he ended up interrupting her again, but this time, for a good (enough) cause.

"NOW THAT'S WHAT I'MM TALKING ABO4T! YOU GOT [Guts] B4DDY!! [[Discomfort And Abdominal Pain]] IN THOSE [[GUTS]]!!"
With how weirdly her rail gun vibrated after that, Uzi thought something was going wrong, it was just Spamton doin a little dance, sorta.

"...BUT! You're helping me take down the murder drones when you're done helpin me build your temporary home!"

"SURE THING...WHAT'S A MURDER [Unidentified Flying Objects]??"
Uzi smiled a very dangerous smile, with this laugh that wasn't entirely happy, and was more maniacal than anything, which as everyone knows, is a sign that person's going to save the world...anyway...this little interaction..,well, it led to many things, were they good? That's for you to decide, I frankly don't really know and honestly, a crooked spammy salesman and an angsty rebellious girl with a railgun is an astonishing combination that wouldn't have come to be if KYLER didn't ruin everything! (I hope your woes are many and your days are few Kyler!)