Fighting The Urges

Part 1

(Emily's Pov)

I woke up to the sound of my alarm this morning, and swung my hand over in an attempt to turn it off. It's 5 in the morning and I know I need to get ready for work, but I don't want to get up. After gathering the motivation to move I swing my legs over the side of the bed, once I get myself together I push myself so I'm standing up. After grabbing my bathrobe I slowly walk over to my bathroom, I already know the first thing I need to do. I turn around and lock the door behind me, even though I don't live with anyone it's just become a force of habit by now. After I lock the door I take my scale out and take off my bathrobe, the light flickers for just a moment before the number appears.

It takes a second for my brain to process the number being shown to me, but once it understands my thoughts just begin to race. *Fuck, how has it only been 31 hours and I've already gained 3 pounds. How did you manage that? Oh I know, because you never stop eating. I swear every time I look at you, you're eating.*

After getting out of my shower I practically rush to the locked drawer my scale stays in, just to grab the one thing that's been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. All I need is to feel calm, and this is the only way I know how to achieve that. Once I'm done doing what I'm doing I gather myself and unlock the door, I slowly walk towards my closet. Today I've decided to wear a black pantsuit, I walk over to my vanity to straighten my hair. I finished getting ready at about 5:30 so I rushed downstairs to the one place in my apartment I hate going to most, my kitchen. Today I decide to pass on breakfast and just make a black coffee instead, I grab my keys and go-bag and head to my car.

I've been working at the BAU for about 5 months now, and I really love the team. It takes me 45 minutes to get to work but I think it's worth it, the job is great but so are the people too. While pulling into the parking lot at the FBI I can see Aaron Hotchner getting out of his car, I quickly park, grab my things and walk over to him.  "Good morning Prentiss, You're here a bit earlier than I expected you to be."  

I smile and reply with "Good morning, I know I got ready way quicker than I thought I would. Do we have a new case?" 

As he is about to enter the elevator he tells me that we do have a new case, and we will be discussing it when the rest of the team gets there at 6:30. I smile and walk towards the stairs, I have 15 minutes before the team gets here. Once the thought went through my brain once there was no stopping it, I couldn't help it but run up and down the stairs for those 15 minutes. 

After going up and down the stairs countless times and taking 5 minutes to rest I make my way to the 6th floor, I enter the bullpen and make my way to my desk only to be stopped by Spencer. "Where were you? We have been waiting for you to start discussing the case." 

"Whoa, what's the problem? Just because I'm a few minutes late, what's your deal today?" I instantly get defensive. "Nevermind. Let's just go review the case with the team." He looks sad. and feel really bad for talking to him like that. Normally I would never talk to him that way, I've just been lashing out at people recently. The team can tell something's up, definitely. 

"We have 5 victims, 3 male 2 female." JJ explains "FIVE??? Why weren't we called in sooner?" Spencer questions. I also wondered why we didn't get called in sooner but I dont care enough to ask today. 

I guess I must have zoned out because the next thing I know Rossi is trying to get my attention, and the team isn't in the room anymore.