Hakuouki ~The Floating World~ (Fem!Reader x Harem) [ENG]

Chapter 11: Sabishii

It's been half an hour since your gaze has been glued to the screen. Only this is lighting up your small monotone room; everywhere that the light doesn't reach, remains drowned in the dark.

You blink, then rub up your tired eyes. Not good, you're starting to drift away. You should finally finish and save it, instead of reflecting on it all the time. Nothing good will come out of waiting.

"...I've tried, I've really tried," you say, typing simultaneously. How pathetic it sounds, when you read it out loud. "But I can't anymore."

You swallow down. A pressure blooms in your chest that you can't exactly describe. But with every breath you take, the more pain you feel. Is that what it feels like to have your heart broken?

You shake your head, still writing. You can't just give in to the overwhelming feeling of being hopeless. Not when you are creating something so important.

"I'm sorry for everything; for all those days, months, years being... well, me. I've messed it up so badly; I've disappointed you. I'm so sorry." The invisible rope tightens around your throat as the tears are running up to your eyes; and yet, you continue on. "I haven't thought that there'll be a day when I'll finally write to you, you know? I've hated you for so long. And now... It seems like it didn't make sense. Because the one who's been a magnet for trouble is me. It's because of me the things always ended up the same way."

You take a deep breath. Do it. Finish the letter; this shitty tearful confession no one's going to read out. Don't be a coward.

"Do we have any influence on our future? I don't know." Your fingers keep on tapping nervously on the keyboard, creating a word by a word, a sentence by a sentence. "The only thing I know is that you're the best that's happened to me. I fucking miss you terribly."

Now you can't stop tears from coming – they are running down your cheeks as you weep like a kid. They are so hot, it feels like they're burning your skin.

You raise your fingers, which used to be hanging in the air a moment ago, just above the key. You bite down on your lip, stamping your leg again and again in nerves. However, in the end, you gather your courage; you close your eyes and, despite all the doubts you have, you press the "Save" button.