In October of 2023, I joined our high school's swim team. Slowly, I just got so busy I wouldn't eat meals. I had struggled with my weight in the past so to me it didn't matter. So what if I lost a couple pounds. I was watching myself and I had even read Winter Girls by Laurie Halse Anderson. I promised myself I wouldn't go that way. Oh little did I know.
It started with skipping meals. Then it went to looking at myself in the mirror and thinking 'Wow, I'm fat. I have stretch marks. I'm not like those girls at school, skinny and curvy.'
There were days where there were team dinners. Though I wouldn't puke up my food after, I would only eat little bits of it. I did that at school too and my best friends was even concerned, convincing me to eat lunch. I never did though, it made me sick to my stomach. I felt like whenever I had eaten, I'd eaten a rock. It felt heavy and sickening. I went into a mental numbness and that's where things took a turn.
YOU ARE READING
The Shadow of Myself
Non-FictionThis is based on a true story, my story. I've recently been battling an Eating disorder, and depression. Mixed with my anxiety and stress that I've had my entire life, I want to raise awareness and tell you. This is common, you are not alone. Please...
