my own savior

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You know that feeling you get when you're a kid?

When you're out swimming in the lake and you venture off to the deep end while know one's looking and it's not until then that you realize you can't swim? And suddenly you're drowning, you keep coming up for air and wailing your hands around waiting for someone to notice you. You try to scream but the water is entering your lungs, clogging your airway, until you're saved.

It's different now in a sense that life is the lake. And when you're older, there's no one else around you that can sense you're drowning. You can speak but it's the judgement, the insecurity, and the feeling of being a burden to someone else that is the water blocking your airway. And when they don't see you drowning, there's no one that can save you

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