chapter sixth

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Ashton's pov

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Ashton's pov

Have you ever had a song stuck in your head? Like so stuck that even after listening to it multiple times, it won't go away?

After meeting Joliè. I had Halsey's 'Finally' stuck in my head. It's weird knowing that our bodies can feel something so strong while the mind is stuck replaying the moments of the worst times of your life.

Meeting Joliè did something to the chaos in my mind.

I felt lighter, like a bird as it glides through the sky without a care in the world.

I can't say I've ever felt this way and no I'm not saying it's because of the beautiful woman I saw in the bagel shop.

I am saying, I feel different after having interacted with her.

It was the first time I saw someone like that since my breakup. Which I guess is another sign I'm on the road to recovery.

Despite all of these things pointing very clearly to the fact that I could be potentially interested in the woman, I'm not ready to explore those feelings when I haven't even spoken to Rylee since the day I ran from our house.

As I drove back to the condo, I couldn't help but drive to the area of town where Rylee worked.

I parked a couple lots away looking at the all too familiar bar where I used to spend most of my free time when I wasn't working.

When Rylee told me she wanted to own a club, I was skeptical because she loves to get an idea, start it then forget about it.

The bar was a compromise to ensure she could handle it. A club would've been a bigger burden I wasn't ready or willing to take over.

Much to my surprise, she's held it down very steadily for two whole years. I haven't been inside since the breakup and I had no intention of going inside today.

I just wanted to make sure it was still standing. I missed the bar stool that I used to sit on watching Rylee work when I was feeling needy.

I also missed the old style jukebox that Rell reconfigured to be able to use modern day devices to play whatever we liked.

I even missed the older woman who came in every day without fail just to say hi to us both and sit in the booth by herself with a vodka cranberry.

My life has been nothing but hotel rooms and sadness for 2 months straight.

Being home means finding a new flow to things which includes not visiting the bar every day.

I won't come home and jump onto Rylee forcing her love, attention and back scratches.

I had to find a new rhythm by myself.

It might sound strange, but I've never really been alone.

I've always had Rylee or Drew with me. Rell and Daja have their own lives and we haven't spent time together all that much since we were growing up.

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