HEART TO HEART. blue lock

10. WHAT COMES AFTER RAIN IS MORE RAIN

PLEASE NOTE: grief is discussed and is a recurring theme in this chapter.

1. off-page death of a pet, specifically of a dog. it's mentioned the moment hulk appears and is talked about between him and hyouma.

2. again, off-page death of a parent, specifically hyouma's dad.

stay safe!

-joy

☆☆☆

HE WAS A HORRIBLE FRIEND.

and when he fails his landing, hyouma also realises that the tear sound is similar to a rubber band.

he wants to try and stand up and run away from the prying eyes of the stadium, but his knee feels so fucking painful to bear more weight on top of the shame he feels.

so embarrassing. first season in the first year of high school and the first thing he loses is his oh-so-treasured ability to kick a ball.

hyouma should've been used to it by now; losing things that he cares about, only for them to grow into grief that defines him as a person, whether he cares or not.

so regardless of whether he likes it or not, he'll just have to hold back his tears as he bites his lip hard enough that it bleeds. even with the taste of iron enriching his tongue, he doesn't feel any pain from it. the pop on his knee hurts damn well that he feels numb everywhere else.

perhaps that's why he doesn't notice it until teardrops stain the dirt on his knee.

crying in front of people is more humiliating than the pain he has.

he wants to answer the yells of his name and worried questions of the people around him, but his throat is burning as much as his eyes are. his breath hitches just so his cries can be silent instead of pathetic muffles and sobs. he can't let anyone see him like this, but his eyes can't stop welling up with more tears.

the shouts from the stands are almost as muffled as his sobs are in his ears. he wonders if that asshole y/n is watching his downfall, too. if he's yelling beside hyouma's family or if he's just staring at him like another ghost to grieve.

the medics pull him to his feet to place him on the stretcher, except hyouma feels like the purpose of it is to emphasise that he most likely just tore a ligament in his knee.

and that he was a horrible friend for making light of y/n's injuries, furthermore only realising that after he experienced it himself.

asshole may be a bit too much. that word should be on behalf of hyouma when it's resentment that he clutches with a rubber band, reserved just in case y/n ever runs back, so hyouma will have something to hold against him; against their relationship.

so damn bitter and useless, yet hyouma can't let go. it's the last flake of his stardust that hyouma has. it sprinkles his world in moments of aching, and it leaves its sky begging for more.

he's holding desperately onto the loss of a friendship that never mattered to y/n.

it fucking hurts.

☆✮☆

sometimes, hyouma would catch y/n looking out beyond the window.

he would stare at y/n, and the longing in his eyes that's not directed towards him, that could've never been him, but rather, at the park past the glass frame.

it should've been obvious then, how hyouma and y/n were both longing. except y/n didn't reciprocate his stare, too busy being in a daze for kids kicking back and forth a soccer ball across the street.