The Blank Past

Chapter 1

The rain has been falling heavily, since the late afternoon. The sky is gloomy and dark with a chilly air in the room just like Susan's heart at the moment. Clutching her chest in pain, and silent tears falling rapidly from her eyes to the ground. Still standing at the window with a melancholy face, chilled by the cold breeze from the open window. She had decided to take a quick nap before dinner but soon she is woken up by her worst nightmare. She had forgotten today again, because of her usual busy schedule. Running from her shadow and past hurt. A shadow is a reflection of who you are, it will keep following you no matter how you try to run from it. She should have known, she couldn't run away by keeping busy all the time.

The breeze from the window blew Susan's long blond hair to her face, obstructing those ocean blue eyes that are so clear like the purest stream but holds deep secret within it's calmness. Even with the tears that keeps falling from her eyes,she couldn't resist staring into the dark night. Her body shivers from the cold breeze, and her already pale skin looks paler like a ghost.

Reliving her worst nightmare in a dream more vividly has been more terrifying once again. It been thirteen years, thirteen long years of still carrying the same pain. She can't seem to move on or let go of the past. Even with the amazing people around her now, she is still scared and haunted. Her mind continuously keeps playing games with her, sometimes not being able to differentiate between reality and her past. Maybe, keeping busy has been a way to keep the monster in check and out of mind. Exhausting her body has been an escape route for herself.

She had exhausted herself through out the week, having one international meeting conference to another. Keeping sleepless night, and studying one contract to another. She had only wanted to take a nap for three hours before dinner.

The memories floods into her mind like a tap of water been turn on. She could feel the monster touching her skin again, like he did then. Immediately she could feel her skin having goose bumps all over, not knowing if it is from the cold or from the fear. His touch, her fear, keeps surfacing again, and it is sinking her into a deep dark hole. She feels like he is really touching her, making her breathless and overwhelmed once again with fear.

Until Susan felt a touch at her arm that feels like warmth, she flinched suddenly. Her maid Ria had been knocking on the door of her Madam, Susan room. She entered inside since she hadn't gotten any response from her Madam. After entering the room she had called unto Susan. But Susan had been lost in her thought and memories to realize any presence beside her until she felt a touch at her arm.

Ria was slightly surprised by her Madame's reactions, but understands. She has been serving Susan for the past five years, and have noticed somethings about her Madam, Susan.

Susan just stare at Ria like she was looking at an unfamiliar face. Ria couldn't take the stare anymore, she lowered her head. She then said with a small smile, "Madam, dinner is ready should the food be serve at the dining table. "

Ria keeps waiting for a reply until she noticed how pale her Madam is than usual, and the window is opened. She noted in her mind she had personally closed the window because of the heavy rain, and the breeze. Susan had opened the windows after waking up from a nightmare. She had felt suffocated.

Ria moved to her Madam's side and close the window. Moving away to get a blanket to wrap her Madam shivering body. Susan still kept silent during everything like a child staring innocently at a stranger. Susan was dazzed at the moment, not knowing how to differentiate between the past and the present at the moment.

Ria excused herself seeing her Madam in such a state. Ria left the room sadly, not knowing if she should inform the Butler, Butler Lee. Butler Lee had been working with Madam since childhood, she have heard rumors from the other maids mouth. She have also notice it sometimes, the way her Madam treat Butler Lee like a father figure sometimes. Their relationship is not to close, but closer than most people around Madam. She contemplated until she decided to give her Madam some space, and when she's asked she will inform Butler Lee. Madam life might look luxurious and happy sometimes because of the wealth she possess to most people. The truth is far from the reality of things.

Since when her maid Ria left her room she was still in a trance. Until she pulled herself forceful from those memories that longs to cling to her tightly.

Her stomach rumble loudly, Susan had eaten little during her breakfast in the morning and had skipped lunch meal at work. She would have also skipped dinner, she knows she can't sleep this night again until she take her sleeping pill. She walked aimlessly from her room to the dining room to force feed herself before taking her pills.

Susan is a very petite lady with a small frame, like a fragile egg that could break if you hold her too tight. She tend on arousing the nature of care from people unconsciously. Even most of her male business partner, tend on letting down their guard during crucial contract signing and meetings. At first, she is viewed as an harmless ant, but she is a lion. She had started her own company at an early age. Making her company be one of the best in the country.

When the maids saw her walking in to the dining, they scurried away immediately to set the meal. During the meal, the food is tasteless, because of her sour mood. It all tasted bland, even the most appetizing meal on the table. After taking some few bites, she lost her appetite. Then she left the dining room to her room to take her sleeping pill as usual.

The whole mansion is huge and magnificent, her mom Lauren, had gifted it to her at her fifteen birthday. She thought having a personal space could quickly facilitate her healing process. She had moved out during her highschool to her new furnishing mansion. Her mom, Lauren had decided to allow Butler Lee to serve her and had supported her decision.