The Boot: A Tim Bradford love story

Chapter 6 ~ Upset & Tired

Elsie hit her bed with a thud. Her hot tears sinking into her blanket as she gripped it in her fists as if for stability. She felt like she couldn't breathe. She couldn't be Bipolar. She promised herself she would be different from her mom. She had to be.

Her mother was a wreck. Elsie had to take care of her most her life. Her dad struggled with depression so it has hard on him to have to deal with his own wife. So Elsie stuck with it, she loved her mom, but she had to give up so much in her life just to be able to take care of her parents.

Elsie's head began to rush. She felt alone. She was angry. Ashamed. Embarresed. Elsie was scared. What did this mean? Would this effect her as a cop? Even though she had only been working for less than a week, Elsie loved her job. It was the only thing she had stuck with. The only thing she cared about. The only thing she wanted to do.

Elsie's heart began to burn. She would have to tell her friends. She would have to tell Sergant Gret. She would have to tell Tim Bradford. What if they thought she was crazy. What if they thought she was unsafe. A danger to herself and/or others. They would all leave her. She would be alone.

Falling to the floor, her hands started to shake as she tried to calm herself down before she failed, starting to cry harder as she curled up into a ball against her bedframe. Elsie felt like she was going to pass out. Just as she was about to do so, she heard her front door open.

"Elsie?" she heard Lucy's voice "It's just me"

"In here" Elsie called between sobs. Lucy ran into the room and her face flashed with worry as she saw the state her best friend was in. "What happened?" Lucy's voice soft

"I'm bipolar" Elsie cried as she burried her face in her hands. Lucy sat down next to the girl.

"Oh, Its gonna be okay Els" Lucy comforted her friend

"No it wont be!" She whinned

"Why. you can go on medication, and carry on with life" Lucy said as she rubbed Elsie's arm.

"You don't get it! You haven't seen what it does to people! You don't know what its like to live with it!" Elsie Argued.

"What do you mean?" Lucy asked, wondering why her friend was so worked up.

Elsie took a big breath "My mom has it. My whole life I was taking care of her. I've seen how it slowly rots you inside. It drains you"

Lucy just stared at the wall. "Well, Your different. Your strong. You just need to get on medication, I promise it will be okay"

"Yeah, sure" Elsie stated blankly. Lucy sighed and got up to walk into the kitchen to get her a glass of water

She walked back in and handed her the glass. "Your going to be okay Elsie" she whispered to her friend as she pulled her into a hug and rubbed her back.

"Thanks" Elsie'a voice full of sarcasm. She was upset her friend was seeing her like this. She was so vulnerable. Just then, Lucy's phone buzzed. "I'm so sorry Elsie I have to go. Call me if you need anything" She sighed as she rushed out of her apartment.

"....Bye"
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Elsie woke up on her couch. Three empty bottles of beer on the coffee table. "Fuck" Elsie groaned as she rubbed her eyes and went to check the time on her phone 5:33. Elsie shot up and rushed to get ready. Her shift started at 6, and the station was 15 minutes away from her apartment.

She didn't even bother doing anything fancy with her hair, just pulling it back into a ponytail and finishing her routine. Elsie stared at herself in her bathroom mirror. Her face was red, her eyes had bags, and the cherry on top, Elsie noticed a pimple on the bottom of her chin. Elsie let out a long whine before grabbing her work bag and saying goodbye to Remy to leave for work.