I lie in bed awake, no feelings, just there. "Deep breaths" I tell myself. "Why take deep breaths when tired of living" I tell myself. It's an ongoing battle with me. Heart telling me to continue. My head asking me to go. When will it end, when will the suffering end? Blade kept near in the side table next to my bed. In a band-aid box with the band-aids. I look down at my wrist, bracelets off my wrist. Full vision of all the times I've been here before. Knowing what is yet to come after, I am no longer in what I call the fresh cut stage. After the "fresh cut stage" I go onto to the stinging stage. The "fresh cut stage" has always been my favorite. It's the one time I can breathe. I feel calm, relaxed, and free. I never feel this way unless I cut. I know when I'm done I will feel regret but also satisfied with the idea I deserved it. When will I be truly free, I ask myself? I know the only way I will be free is the day I die...
I lay there in my bed, still awake. I let my mind wander off, to think about every little thing. I hit the one spot. The one into the past. The reason I am the way I am today. I feel tears fall down my face onto my bed. I dreaded to think about this part of my past. I today know I'm out of the "fresh cut stage".
YOU ARE READING
Forever cut
RandomElizabeth is a teenager who is mentally drained And is losing ever ounce of herself. She hated everything about herself, her looks, her personality, her everything. Then she Mets a boy who doesn't realize he is destroying her every will to live. She...
