The Love Letter (girlxgirl) (lesbian story) gxg

Chapter 20

They were at some sort of supply closet slash equipment room. Helmets and dirty shoes crowded the black metal shelves, a small fridge with hydration drinks sat in the corner between a rolled-up rug and a broken-down speaker. A mirror hung on the wall opposite the door above a small table.

The click of the door locking behind her brought Alison's attention back to Troy. His presence filled every corner of the room, making the small closet feel even smaller. Blood was pounding in her ears, this is exactly what she needed. She hasn't been able to sleep. She told Diego she wasn't feeling good and that she needed the day off. She tried to get some sleep in the morning but the dreams... The fucking dreams about Charlie came back whenever she closed her eyes. So she called Troy and stopped by the football field after practice.

"Are you just going to stand there, or are you going to do something?" She asked with just enough venom in her voice.

Troy's eyes glinted in the dim light. He walked toward her, each slow step sending another jolt of anticipation down her spine. It took him only a few strides to reach her. Troy didn't take his eyes off her as he yanked her pants off and ripped her underwear in the process.

"That was my good underwear, asshole." She bit back.

His hands, on her waist, lifted her up and against him. His taste wasn't sweet but bitter, as if she's put too much salt on her lunch and was now trying to swallow it. She tried to shut out everything but sensation - the feeling of his shoulders and back under her hands, the way her body fit to his, except that it didn't.

Troy pulled her sweater over her head and slid down to the top button on her jeans as his lips parted hers, the way she used to enjoy, but not anymore. "Wait," Alison said.

He drew away, enough for her to see his face. His eyes were glassy, unfocused, pupils dilated, his chest rising and falling quickly. "What's wrong?"

She squeezed her eyes shut. "Nothing I - I just remembered Olivia's waiting for me to go... Grocery shopping."

"Can't she wait?" he said, unbuttoning her jeans and leaving a trail of wet kisses down her neck.

"No, she can't," she lied.

He scoffed, disbelief colored his voice. "Why'd you call me then?"

"I," wanted to get Charlie out of my head. "don't know."

He raised both eyebrows, but instead of saying anything he simply let go of her. "I'm going to take a shower."

When the closet door slammed shut behind him, she sank down to the floor, putting her head in her hands. What was wrong with her? She gathered her things and left, not really sure where she'd go. The usually green trees that surrounded campus didn't have leaves anymore. They were falling and hitting the pavement where Alison was walking on. She shivered, glad that she had worn a scarf to protect her neck. Soon there'd be snow.

"Olivia, what's wrong with me?" Alison asked after walking into the small apartment.

She looked startled, but deep down Olivia had a sense where this was coming from. "So many things, Al. So very many things."

"I'm serious."

"Care to give me a hint?"

Olivia knew her well enough to hear the frustration in her voice. But over the years she had learned to let Alison take the reins when it came to difficult conversations. Having a sense of control made it easier. "I couldn't have sex with Troy."

"And why is that?"

"Because Charlie kissed me when she was drunk last night and I couldn't get it out of my head so I called Troy because I thought I needed to blow off some steam but then I couldn't stop thinking about Charlie while I was with him so obviously my plan didn't work and it's frustrating because I can't stop thinking about it and I couldn't sleep last night because I'm having these fucking dreams-"

"Whoa, what dreams?"

Alison let out a breath. "I had a dream about Charlie."

"What kind of dream?"

"The kind you don't want to wake up from, Olivia. Except this one was with Charlie and not Ryan Reynolds."

"Oh."

"Yes, oh."

Olivia tilted her head, her expression changing from calm to thoughtful. "Have you talked to her?"

"No, I don't think I want to but it's driving me crazy."

Her friend smiled softly. "Well I'm not Charlie but I'm here and I can listen."

"We kissed at a party, so what? We were both drunk and it happens sometimes, it doesn't mean anything. But then she had to fucking kiss me again and complicate things. WHY?"

"I think you know why."

Alison kept on rambling without paying attention to Olivia. "Why not just ignore an uncomfortable situation that happened between us and move on like normal people do? She had to make it even more awkward by avoiding me and then making me force her to talk about it. As if that wasn't enough she had to go on a date with that fucking Jackson guy and then God-knows-why get wasted and say things to me and kiss me and when I asked her why she did it she says because she wanted to? What the fuck is that about?"

"Are you mad at her?"

"I'm way beyond that point."

"Is it because she kissed you or because she went on a date?"

Alison frowned. "I don't care what she does with her love life as long as it doesn't involve me."

"Oh really?"

"Yes, really."

Olivia looked like she wanted to say something else, but settled with an, "Ok."

Alison will have to get there on her own.