NeiRohi / Arohi (OS Book)

I wish I could hate you (Part 4)

"is that night means nothing to you?" Neil asked almost in the verge of breaking down. his hurt eyes not ready to leave his love's eyes which is holding it's tears back. Arohi without uttering a word, turns to leave but to her luck Neil held her by wrist and pulled her close. he twisted her wrist and held it tightly on her back. "aaj nahi..... aaj tum aise nahi jaa sakti Arohi.... maine kuch pucha hai?..... jawab dooo..." (Not today..... you can't leave just like that today.... I'm asking you something..... answer me...) Neil screams his lungs out tears are flowing profusely from his red shot eyes. He calmed seeing a lone tear escaping from her eyes, loosening the grip on her wrist but still holding her close, "please..... aise kyu kar rahi ho Arohiii...... itne saalon ki saza kam hai kya?..... tujhe zara si bhi pata hai ki main kaise thi woh che saal??" (please.... why are you doing this Arohi...... the punishment of all these years are not enough?...... do you even a little about how miserable I was in those six years?) Neil said in a broken voice. "Neill....Chod..." (Neil..... leaveee...) Neil puts his finger on her lips to shush her. "aaj nahii..... aaj main na chup rahunga na tumhe chod ke jaaunga" (not todayy.... today neither I'll be quiet nor I'll leave you) Neil said determined. "main maanta hoon ki woh meri galti hai ki main tujhe nahi rokaa par.... par main kahi baar iss keliye maafi maang chuka hoon aur aage bhi puri zindagi par maafi maagne ka taiyaar hoon. par tum.... tum toh maaf karne ke kyaa? meri baat sunne ke bhi taiyaar nahi hai.... aur tum... tum kaise kisi aur se shaadi karne keliye ready ho gayii?..... kya hamare beech kuch bhi nahi haiii?.... kya main aur mera pyaar itna kamsoor hai ki tu itne aasani se bhul chuki ho?...." (I agree that was completely my mistake I didn't stopped you.... but I've apologized many times for this and I'm ready to apologize for rest of my life. but youuu.... leave about forgiving... you're not even ready to hear me.... and you.... how could you said yes to marry someone?.... is that nothing between us?..... is that me and my love that much weak that you so easily forgot everything?) Neil poured his heart out. "tum kya kehna chahti ho?..... kya sab galti meri hai?" (what you means to say?..... is that everything's my fault?) Arohi yelled at him back but he stopped her, "maine aise kuch nahi kaha. tumhari problem hi ye hai..... pehle tu mujhe samjhne ke koshish kar. maine tumhare jaane ke baad kaise tut gayi thi ki kya tumhein usspe andaaza bhi nahi hai. maine paaglon ki tarah sab jagah tumhe dhoonda par tum..... tum toh pehle se bhi mujhse bohut door chali gayi thi" (I have not said anything like that. this is what your problem.... first you try to understand me.... do you even have a idea about how broken I was when you left me. I'm searched you everywhere like a mad man...... but you.... you went far away from me..) Neil said offened. "exactly. tumne mujhe dhoonda.... mujhe maaf kiya, mujhe phirse tumhari zindagi mein wapas laane ki koshish kiya.... but that's NOT BECAUSE YOU LOVE ME. IT'S BECAUSE I WAS CARRYING YOUR BABY" (exactly. you've searched me.... you forgave me, you tried to get me back inyour life..... but that's NOT BECAUSE YOU LOVE ME. IT'S BECAUSE I WAS CARRYING YOUR BABY) Aarohi screamed at her lungs. Neil is shocked would be the understatement, he never ever in his dream would think that Arohi will like this. "Kyaa.... Kya kaha tumne?" (Whattt?..... What did you just said?) Neil said not able to hold back the tears. "haan, sahi suna tumhe. tum, tumhare parivaar aur sab log mujhe sirf yeh baby keliye tolerate kar rahe the. actually ye pehli baar nahi hai. tumhare ghar walon ne mujhe kabhi pyaar hi nahi kiya, woh sab mujhe adjust kar rahe the pata hai kyu?.... TUMHARE LIYEE.... woh dikhava keliye mujhe pyaar aur respect de rahe thi kyunki main.... NEIL BIRLA KI BIWI HOON..... BIWI THI.......aur phir pregnancy news ke baad wala pyaar bhi meri liye nahi woh hamara baby keliye bhi nahi woh TUMHARA BABY keliye. sabhi mujhe NEIL KI BIWI AUR RUHI KI MUMMA se hi pyaar dena ka dikhava kar rahe the, koi AROHI se pyaar nahi karta tha. par tum.... tum mujhse pyaar karta tha.... par baat baby pe aagyi toh tere liye bhi main second priority ho gaya na...... woh false alarm news se sirf tum dukh mein nahi thi.... mere liye bhi woh shocking news tha.... mujhe bhi hurt hua.... meri andar bhi dil hai Neil koi pattar nahi...... par koi bhi meri feelings ke baare mein nahi socha. haan main.... main maanta hoon ki woh baat main tumse nahi chupana chahiye tha. main usse kabhi justify nahi karungi aur main iss baat mein tumhe bohut hurt kiyaa..... par gusse mein tum meri feelings ke baare mein ek baar bhi nahi sochaa..... m-mainn toh tumhe haath chodke kitne baar kaha ki mere baat sunne keliye.... par tumhara narazgi tumhara pyaar ko peeche chod diya. par Thank god, tum uss din meri baat nahi suna aur mujhe second chance nahi diya. kyunki main nahi chahti hoon ki main tumhari zindagi mein sirf tumhari bache ki maa banke raho" (yes, you've heard right. you, your family and everyone were tolerated me only for this baby. actually this is not the first time. your family members never loved me, they were just adjusting me... you know whyyy?..... FOR YOU..... they were giving me the namesake love and respect because... I'M NEIL BIRLA'S WIFE..... I WAS..... and they love I've received after the pregnancy news is not for me..... even it's not for our baby..... they loved me, because it's YOUR BABY. everyone loved me as NEIL BIRLA'S WIFE AND RUHI'S MOTHER but no one loved AROHI. but you...... you really loved me... but when the topic comes to baby, I became a second priority to you...... only you're not in pain by that false alarm news..... that's shocking news for me too..... I'm also so hurt with that.... Even I've a heart Neil... not any rock.... but no one ever thought about my feelings. yes I... I agree that i shouldn't have hid that truth from you. and I won't justify my mistake in that and I've hurt you so much in this matter..... but in anger you didn't even thought for a second about my feelings.... I-I've pleaded you to listen to me for once..... but you're hatred overtook your love.... but Thank god, that day you didn't listen to me... and you didn't give me any second chance.... because I don't want to live my life just as you babies's mother) Arohi finally give in to the inner battle she's having all these years and poured out what's in her heart. "tumhein sach mein ...... aisa lag raha hai..... kii..... main tumhe.... sirf babyy keliyee.....?" (Do you really..... think that.... I am.... just..... for babyy...?) Neil's voice is broken to even complete that, the hurt is physically visible on him but he's still holding her. "jab main sunna ki tum missing ho.... tab mujhe baby yaad nahi tha.... aur baby ke baare bhi main kuch nahi jaanta uss waqt. main tumhare liye kabraa gaya tha, meri narazgi, gussa sab chod ke main tujhe dhunde keliye ghar se nikhalaa..... sirf tumein dhundne keliye.... tumhe milene keliyee.... main Goenka house gaya tha, aur tumhari bhaiyon ka gussa bhi saga.... woh sab bache keliye nahii.... uss waqt meri liye sirf TUM aur tumhari safety keliye fikar tha. uske baad hi mujhee..... mujhe woh letter mila.... jo letter tum mere liye likhi thi.... usse mujhe baby ki baare mein pata chalaa..... main ye che saal har marke marke zinda raha tha..... sirf tumhare liye.... ki ek din main tumse milunga. aur tumse maafi maangunga. haan, main Rooh se pyaar karta hoon bohut zyada...... aur bhi karunga. par mere dil mein aur meri zindagi mein tumhari jagah koi nahi le sakta...." (When I heard that you're missing..... I don't think about baby.... and even that time I don't know about baby. I gets anxious thinking about you, leaving all my hatred and anger behind I went to search you..... only to search you.... to meet you.... I went to Goenka house, and I accepted your brothers anger too.... I didn't do these for baby.... all I cared about that moment was only YOU and Your safety. after sometime only..... I got that letter..... the letter which you have written for me about our baby..... by which I got to know about our baby.... I was dying every moment in these six years but still I'm alive only in a hope to meet you one day..... to let you know how sorry I was feeling.... yes, I love Rooh.... I love her so much.... and will continue to do more... but No one can take place of you both in my heart and my life......) Neil's saying everything which he kept inside him for years putting Arohi in a dilemma again, but then she remembered how he easily moved on and married someone and now he's saying all this to Arohi. "Bas...... meri zindagi ki sabse badi galti hai ki tumhe pyaar karna aur woh pyaar main apne aap ko khona..... par woh Arohi che saal pehle hi mar chuki hai ab main tumhe pyaar nahi karti hoon...." (Enoughh...... loving you and losing myself in that is the biggest mistake of my life.... but that Arohi was died six years back... now I won't love youu....) Arohi lied making his heart sank. He's hurt..... her every words are stabbing his heart, but composing himself Neil pulled her more closely not ready to loss her once again. "Kya kaha tumne?..... ab pyaar nahi karti tum mujhse? haan bolo.... Arohiii.... toh us raat jo hua hai uska kya?.... ye mat kehna ki woh galti se ho gayi ya it's just a accidental thing and all..... mujhe pata hai aur tujhe bhi achee se pata hai ki humare beech jo hua woh galti se nahi hua...... uss raat tumhari akhon mujhse kaha hai ki tum mujhe kitna pyaar karti hai.... aur maine dekha ki...... aaj bhi meri touch tumhe bohut effect karti hai..... maine..." (What did you said?.... now you're not loving me?.... tell mee... Arohii.... then what about that night?.... now don't tell me that it's a mistake or it happened accidentally and all..... I know and you also know very well that whatever happened between us that night was not happened mistakenly...... that night I've seen in your eyes the love you have for me...... I've seen that how my touch.... still holds the effect on you.... I....) before he could complete both heard a sound making them flinch.