The Spiteful Sorting Hat

At Flourish and Blotts

They passed the Quidditch supply store on their way to purchase textbooks. Blaise nudged Harry's side and nodded to the broom featured in the window display. Harry looked at the broomstick and had to catch his breath. It was the newest broom in the Nimbus series, the same brand Mrs. Zabini had bought for him last Christmas, only the 2001 edition looked even more streamlined than the last. Harry ached to know how fast it could fly. He stopped in his tracks, taking in every feature of the new model, and thinking to himself that if he had this broom, he would easily take the seeker position on the Slytherin team this year.

"Mum? Can I have a new broom?" Blaise asked his mother, pointing at the window display.

But Blaise wasn't going to have as much luck with a new broom as he had with his new pet. Mrs. Zabini arched an eyebrow and asked, "What's wrong with the broom I bought you last year?"

"Nothing. But this is the Nimbus 2001. I'll bet it's the fastest broom ever made!"

"Fast brooms are what killed your step-father Icarus, remember?"

"That was a prototype."

"I'm not getting you a new broom every time a new model is released, Blaise."

"But..."

"End of discussion."

Mrs. Zabini began walking down the street once again. Blaise followed at a slower pace, pouting magnificently. Millie, who'd never cared much about flying anyway, resumed her walk with a quiet, "Coming, Harry?"

Harry gave one last look at the glorious broom, then jogged to catch up with the long strides of his taller friends. He knew he could afford the Nimbus 2001 with the money jangling in his pocket, but it didn't seem right for him to purchase a new broom when Blaise was denied the same gift. Plus, he didn't want to seem ungrateful for the broom Mrs. Zabini had given him last year.

They reached Flourish and Blotts in no time at all, though Harry was at a loss to see how they would get in. The bookstore, always crowded by stacks and stacks of heavy books, was now fit to burst with all the people crowding through its open door. The line was so long they were spilling into the street, and Harry couldn't help but notice most of them were witches.

The explanation was soon apparent. The window display boasted the entire collection of Gilderoy Lockhart's books, their covers and titles dwarfed by a large poster of the wizard himself. Harry looked at the portrait, which was smiling and waving at the witches in line who tittered and fussed with their hair as if they'd been standing in front of the real thing. Harry saw shining words printed below the smiling face, proclaiming that the author would be having a book signing that very afternoon.

"You mean we actually get to meet him?" Blaise said with a laugh. He seemed excited by the prospect of meeting a wizard who had gained such sudden fame.

Millie groaned as she too spotted the date on the poster. "Oh no. My mum hasn't stopped talking about him all summer. I think she fancies him."

"Well, I've never heard of any Gilderoy Lockhart," Mrs. Zabini said, eyeing the handsome image with interest, "We'll have to see if he's worth all the fuss."

They had to wait in the crush struggling to enter the door, but soon enough, they were in. A harassed looking shop clerk was trying to shepherd the throng of witches into an orderly line, but they all resolutely ignored him, as each witch in the shop craned her neck to get a better view of the blond-haired, blue-eyed wizard grinning as broadly as his portrait. Gilderoy Lockhart was sitting at a table on a sort of raised dais, surrounded by yet more copies of his book, each cover displaying his face and all his bright, white teeth.