Venus: The Odyssey to Happiness

Part 3

Everyone experienced losses within their family or close circles during this period marked by the pandemic. One of the most painful, if not the most devastating, trials occurred during Eid-el-Kebir. The impact of COVID on the celebration was palpable, creating a unique atmosphere. As men performed the ritual sacrifice of sheep, my phone rang. I answered, and on the other end was an old friend. After the customary greetings, she asked me to sit down. Intrigued, I asked her the reason for this call, and she simply replied, "Our friend." Having only one friend in common, the possibility that it was her split me in two, eliciting a heartbreaking cry. On my friend's end, sobs erupted. "Let's thank God," she said. It dawned on me how privileged we were to have shared our lives with this friend. The phrase "taken from our affection" took on its full meaning. Rella was not just a friend; she was my sister.

Rella had been my support during the loss of my grandmother, being one of the few to understand my emotional distress. She had tried to entertain me and take my mind off things. Our last conversation was about shared projects, as dynamic young women aspiring to make our mark in our respective fields. The shock of reality overwhelms me when I realize that Rella is no longer here. My brain struggles to assimilate this information, and my parents are equally affected. Considering my family obligations, I focus all my energy on preparing a meal that should have been festive. My actions become automatic, devoid of thought. However, I make an effort to finish the dish because once served, it will lead me to face the horrendous reality: Rella is no more.

I go to the funeral home while the men accompany Rella to her final resting place in the cemetery. On that day, in an instinctive surge, I search for the one who was, and I struggle to conjugate her existence in the past. The return of the men is marked by the sight of the cover that wrapped Rella's body. This traditional woven cloth absorbs the full extent of my hopes of seeing her again on earth. My friend is gone forever, taken by COVID.

Recalling our first meeting at seven, I remember a chubby Rella and an energetic Venus. As teenagers, we were two cute young girls, especially Rella, beautiful with fine features, slender and pleasantly plump. As young adults, we shared significant experiences, the hardships of foreign students, her marriage, her pregnancies. At every stage of our lives, we thought we could continue like this until the end, and yet, at 30, our destinies impose the most heartbreaking farewell. I then meditate on all the things left unsaid with Rella. Why didn't I express my affection for her? Why didn't I tell her how privileged I was to be her friend?

The fine rain brings me back to reality. Looking at the sky, the twilight in shades of orange and pink appears as beautiful as my friend whom I will never see again. At that moment, I realize that I am living the last day of a part of my life and the first day of a new life without Rella.

The days following Rella's departure are of unbearable pain. COVID continues to wreak havoc, and my emotions are numbed. In the span of six months, I lost my grandparents, my uncle, and this special person who was Rella. These loved ones were essential to the image I had of my wedding ceremony. Since I was seven, I never envisioned my marriage without them. The reality of life forces me to accept that they will not be part of this celebration, if it happens. Why get married if the dearest people to our hearts cannot share this day with us?

The inevitable absence of Mame Venus and Rella becomes a reality. Lost in my own existence, activities that once brought me pleasure are now tasteless. Boredom sets in; I no longer know what to do or who to talk to during the moments I used to devote to these loved ones. Consequently, I lock myself in my room to escape reality by sleeping. My days are swallowed by procrastination. Is it a way of envying Rella and my grandmother for no longer being in this world?

Yet, Rella manages to find me in my dreams. Surrounded by majestic trees in a beautiful place, she shares her dismay at my actions. Upon waking, a newfound determination takes hold of me. That Sunday morning, for the first time in my life, I step through the gates of a cemetery. It is a necessary step to acknowledge my loss, put things in their place, and finally move forward in my life. After my visit to the cemetery, I more easily accept my new reality. Death is part of life, and it is crucial to cherish every moment with our loved ones as if it were the last. I realize how fortunate I am to have shared so many years of happiness with them. Life has separated us, and it is necessary to adapt.

I embark on new fulfilling habits, taking care of myself, and opening up to new encounters. However, my life will never be the same. Things resonate differently, and it will take time to fully accept everything.

Despite the trials, my daily life goes on, between work and interactions with others. However, nothing is as it was before. Perhaps I have become aware of the irreversible nature of life. In an effort to explore new sensations, I decide to step out of my comfort zone. I start taking care of myself and my appearance, slowly regaining the lost weight and achieving a beautiful figure.

One Friday, while I am in my office, one of my colleagues enters in search of documents. Her radiant black complexion catches my attention. She wears a white dress that embodies Senegalese elegance. Later in the day, I encounter her in the corridors, and her beautiful skin strikes me again. Congratulating her on her glow, I discover that she uses products from the 'skinlikeglass' Instagram page. We engage in a brief conversation, and I find out her name is also Rella.

In addition to Rella, two other dynamic young women, Nathalie and Sophie, are part of the company. They are ambitious, talented, and epicurean. All four of us joined this company a year ago. It is a typically Senegalese company, with its peculiarities, gossip, clans, and other details that sometimes hinder progress in our developing countries.

I begin to hang out with these new friends. Towards the end of the year, we get involved in organizing Nathalie's wedding, then in the baptism of Sophie's child. Preparations occupy my mind. As fashion enthusiasts, we attach great importance to every detail, be it the outfit, jewelry, shoes, hairstyle, or makeup. On the latter two points, my new friends have valuable contacts. Gradually, I rediscover the taste for living.

I flourish alone, radiating in my own world. Every day, I traverse the company's corridors with a light step. It is in these same corridors that I will meet Elimanel, a meeting that will shake some of my certainties.