Gameknight999 Oneshits

incorrect quotes

Reaper: *sucking on a popsicle*
Xa-Tul: Pfft, you practicing for when Feyd gets here?
Reaper: *takes a huge ass bite out of the popsicle*
 Xa-Tul: *Concern*

Charybdis: I sleep with a gun under my pillow.
Xa-Tul: I sleep with a knife.
Reaper: Both of you are pathetic.
Charybdis: Oh yeah? What do you sleep with?
Reaper: Feyd.

Feyd: This food is too hot... I cant eat it.
Reaper: You're very hot, and I still eat you.
Everyone at the table: *silence*
Xa-Tul: YOU GUYS ARE DISGUSTING
Charybdis: One dinner... I just want ONE DINNER!

Twas at this point I realized I had the NSFW version on.  And the shipping version.

Charybdis: Ducks are better than rabbits.
Reaper: What? Rabbits are adorable. Have you ever been in a fight with a duck? Ducks are jerks. Xa-Tul: Duck is delicious! Rabbit is all gamey.
Reaper: We're not talking about flavour, Xa-Tul!
Xa-Tul: Flavour counts!
Reaper: Who carries around a duck's foot for good luck? Anyone?
Feyd: You wrap yourself in a comforter stuffed with rabbit hair. I'll wrap myself in a comforter stuffed with duck feathers! Who's cozier?
Reaper: Okay, but-
Feyd: NO, NO, NO, NO. WHO'S COZIER?
Xa-Tul: Then why don't we take a rabbit, a duck, stick 'em in a cardboard box and let them fight it out!
Reaper: BECAUSE IT'S ILLEGAL, XA-TUL!
Xa-Tul: ONLY IF WE BET ON IT, REAPER!
Charybdis: I- Jesus-

Reaper, driving and singing to the Little Einsteins theme song: We're going on a trip-
Xa-Tul: In our favorite piece of shit!
Charybdis: Doing 95!
Feyd: We're gonna fucking die!

Reaper: Why do you look like that?
Charybdis, laying face-first on the floor: Like what?
Reaper: Like you're dead.
Charybdis: It's because I'm dying. Leave me here to perish.
Feyd: Charybdis accidentally called Xa-Tul "babe" in front of everyone today.
Charybdis: *sobs into the floor*

Xa-Tul: I'm not mean. Name one mean thing I've ever done.
Charybdis: When we were younger, you convinced me eggs weren't real.
Xa-Tul: They're not.
Charybdis: Haha, very funny.
Xa-Tul: I'm serious. Didn't you hear?
Charybdis: No... what happened?
Xa-Tul: ...Why would you fall for this again-

Xa-Tul: Damn, the power went out.
Feyd: Don't worry, I got this.
Feyd: *stomps foot*
Xa-Tul: What-?
Feyd: *Sketchers light up*

Charybdis, Feyd & Reaper: *screaming*
Xa-Tul: *runs into the room* What's wrong, Reaper?!
Charybdis: Wait, why are you asking Reaper that when Feyd and I are also here?
Xa-Tul: Because Reaper wouldn't scream unless it's an emergency. You two scream whenever you have the chance.

Reaper: I'm having salad for dinner!
Charybdis:
Reaper: Well, fruit salad.
Reaper: Actually, it's mostly grapes.
Charybdis:
Reaper: Okay, it's all grapes.
Reaper: Fermented grapes.
Charybdis:
Reaper:
Charybdis:
Reaper: It's wine.
Reaper: I'm having wine for dinner.

Eerebus: PEASANT. I REQUIRE SUSTENANCE.
Feyd: You know there are other ways to say you want McDonalds.
Erebus: FOUL PLEBEIAN. YOU DARE SPEAK AGAINST ME—
Feyd: *sigh* What do you want?
Erebus: Chicken nuggets please.

Incorrect quotes but it's just Erebus and Malacoda.  And its all sex.

Malacoda: As top in this relationship, I think we should-
Erebus: I can't believe you're pulling rank on me.

Erebus: Bro, I had a dream we fucked.
Malacoda: Bro, relax it was just a dream.
Erebus: Huh, gay, I wouldn't fuck you.
Malacoda: You wouldn't?
Erebus: I mean, unless you want to-

Erebus: Know why I called you in here?
Malacoda: Because I accidentally sent you a dick pic.
Erebus: *Stops pouring two glasses of wine.* Accidentally?

Malacoda: What are you in the mood for?
Erebus: World domination.
Malacoda: That's a bit ambitious.
Erebus: You are my world.
Malacoda: Aww...
Erebus:
Malacoda:
Erebus:
Malacoda: OH.

Erebus: Wow, Malacoda, you want to hold my hand before marriage? How awfully lewd of you. Malacoda: We literally slept together yesterday.
Erebus: That's NOTHING compared to the lewdness of holding hands.

Erebus: Hey, wanna take a shower with me?
Malacoda: I have a gun in that nightstand beside the bed. If I ever say no to that question, I want you to take it out and shot me because I've obviously gone crazy.

Malacoda: You look good in that hoodie.
Erebus: You know where else I'd look good?
Malacoda, zero hesitation: My bed.
Erebus, at the same time: By your side- wait, what?