𝐀𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐨𝐩𝐡𝐨𝐛𝐢𝐚

00

                             ~SKYELAR~

I've always been 'perfect' growing up if you could even call it that.I've been raised to do right or 'act lady like' I've always been my parents perfect little girl scratch that,their perfect little doll.

Every since I could walk and talk my parents have put me in beauty pageants to fix my structure or to even prove that they had the most perfect daughter

Beauty pageants weren't really my thing but I only did it for my parents because they always told me about how I was lucky to even be considered to be "pretty" as a darkskin girl because darker skin on women were "ugly".

Or how tall I was for my age as a 'woman' I'm only 17 and I'm 5'8 I don't really think being 5'8 makes you being tall but to my mom it does

But on the only bright side of it I would've been a model only if I didn't have all this ass and boobs model agencies like any girl who's slim flat and really pale

My family grew up in England half of my life then we moved to Texas for a new start and for 'American attention' I had a really strong British accent growing up and I still do but I sometimes cover it because it's one of my insincerities

My parents gave me all different types of insecurities growing up I knew I was pretty but did everyone else think so also?

I hated how my parents made me feel bad about my skin complexion but never my brother it was always one sided love between my brother and parents my parents loved kye but kye hated them and couldn't wait to leave them

Kye adored and loved me he would always talk to me when my parents made me feel down on myself or starve me when I even gained a little weight

they would never hit me because they didn't wanna mark up my beautiful skin they never allowed me to do outside sports or any dirty things because it was very unlady like

Even when puberty hit me my tits grew a little bigger and my ass got really big like big and my thighs. My parents pulled me out of pageants for a year or so until I lost my puberty weight and the acne

I think that's when I started to have problems with me wanting to be to be more perfect for my parents and for me I needed to be perfect because that's all my parents wanted me to be

Me and kye barley got into arguments and when we did we would work it out and always make up even when he left me to go to college the most time we spent without talking was once in his first year because I was upset that he left me and went far away from me

Me and kye grew up very different from each other that's why he's so much more happier and alive beside from me but I can't wait to get my college years started with my brother because I can just feel it now a real life,real friends a relationship REAL SCHOOL.

my parents never really allowed me to go to school they homeschool me my entire life that was probably the only thing my brother was jealous about bc I got to stay home and do my work at home not school

Anyways I'm finishing the rest of my packing to put into my car so I can finally leave this hell hole and be with my favorite person ever and start over start a new life

The life I've always wanted to have instead of this black and white world I had on the insides of my house

I was happy I was actually happy that I could be away from my parents I've never lived without them and now I am

I finished packing my things up walking down the stairs to leave "skyelar" I heard my mothers soft voice say she looks as if she was crying

"mom" I give a fake smile crossing my arms as she walks up to me "my baby...your leaving me now" I bite my bottom lip as I was in the verge of almost crying