The Guilt and The Feelings

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You broke the kiss, looking at him, smiling at you, you chuckled

"I'm afraid I'm gonna ruin this too"
"I won't let you, just you wait"
He said hugging you, the irony was that Mingi was all better now, but you were ruined, Mingi told himself that no matter what, he will be by your side, he didn't know what happened to you but he understood how you felt, he wanted to be there for you

"So it finally happened huh?"
You both heard a voice from behind and turned around to see Seonghwa leaning on the door, you slowly broke the hug, both confused at the older male's sentence

"I saw you two at the airport, I've always known you would end up together, was just wondering why it took so long"
You both got shy when he mentioned the airport

"But oppa, what are you doing up at this hour?"
"I heard noises and I'm a light sleeper, so I woke up and the I saw the garden lights, so I came out and saw you two"
You and Mingi made an O face and stood up, realising that's its still night and they should sleep

"Goodnight guys"
"Goodnight hyung"
"Goodnight oppa"
You and Mingi said to Seonghwa who went upstairs back to his room, you looked back at Mingi who was already looking at you

"Sleep well, sweetheart"
You giggled, it was your favourite nickname, because he called you that, he pecked your lips one last time

"You too, oppa"
You said as you both separated and went to your room, you still couldn't believe it, you actually kissed Song Mingi; you decided to post the photos you clicked of them by the river and fell asleep soon after

- Next day

You woke up, hearing Seonghwa's voice, he smiled at you, looking at your sleepy figure sitting up, eyes still 80 percent shut

"Come on out, we're having breakfast"
"Yeah I'll be there in a sec"
You said standing up as Seonghwa walked out and closed the room, out of habit, you didn't realise that you were searching for a joint in your bag, but as soon as you realised it, you pushed away your bag with a horrified look on your face, just then the door opened and revealed Mingi, as soon as he saw your face, his smile faded

"What happened?"
He said, quickly coming up to you and sat down to your level

"I don't know, my cravings have been getting stronger, oppa, I don't think I can do it"
"Of course you can, and I'm with you always, you have to fight this Y/n"
"But what's the point oppa? It made me happy"
"Do you think you were happy? Or were you just running away from your life?"
You looked down, Mingi hugged you, patting your head

"Stay strong Y/n"
You hugged him for a little while and then you both went out and sat to eat breakfast that Seonghwa had made for you all; you were seated next to San, but Mingi was on your other side, holding your hand under the table throughout breakfast, knowing you were tense

"Mingi, aren't you right handed?"
"Huh? Oh yeah"
Since he was holding your hand with his right hand, he was trying to eat from his left, clearly struggling, that's why Seonghwa noticed and asked him, he left your hand and started eating with his right hand, but still didn't stop thinking about you, so he took off his right slipper and you felt a foot caressing your left one, you chuckled at his unique way of comforting you

"What?"
Jongho asked, hearing you chuckle out of nowhere, you looked up flustered, making Mingi smile

"Nothing"
You said and continued eating; soon finishing your food, you stood up and went to the kitchen to wash your plate, Mingi coming after you, waiting behind you till you finish, you chuckled and looked back at him

"You can give me your plate oppa"
You said as he shaked his head

"No way"
You chuckled and finished washing your plate and stood aside so Mingi could wash his plate; as he was walking forward, he glanced behind him, seeing no one, he quickly gave you a peck on your lips, making you widen your eyes as he chuckled at your flustered state

"Oppa!"
You said as you hit his arm gently, blushing like a tomato, you walked out of the kitchen soon, bumping into San

"Sorry"
You said as were walking past him but he held your hand, making you turn your face at him in confusion

"Don't hurt Mingi like you did with me"
He said, putting his plate on the kitchen table, Mingi heard him and washed his hands quickly, coming up to you

"What are you doing?"
Mingi asked, looking at San holding your hand, he removed his grip on your hand and took you with him; your mind was going all over the place, so many things happening at once; Mingi took you to the side, where no one could hear you

"What was he saying to you?"
Mingi asked, with a mix of rage and confusion on his face

"Nothing oppa"
You tried walking away but he pulled you back and pinned you against the wall

"Y/n tell me"
His deep tone scaring you

"He told me to not hurt you like I did with him"
You looked down, Mingi was about to leave to go to San but you held his hand

"Oppa, don't, it's not San oppa's fault"
"It's not yours either"
He said, leaving your hand and going up San, who had finished his dishes and was sitting with everyone except Jongho, who was in the kitchen

"You have no right"
Mingi said, coming up to San

"I have no right? I got hurt and was trying to save someone I care about from pain and you're telling me that I have no right"
"Yes, I can handle myself, you have no right to meddle"
"Mingi I remember the shit you went through after Hyerin"
Mingi stopped for a second

"Do you know the real reason why I was so fucked up back then?"
He said, making San confused, everyone a little confused as to what was going on except Seonghwa, he saw this coming; Mingi continued speaking without realising Jongho and you entering the scene

"I was so miserable because Y/n left, not because of Hyerin or my parents, because Y/n wasn't there, and I would have to live without her for 5 years, I was so miserable, thinking that I wouldn't be able to on, and now she is back, you know how much my heart broke when I found out about you two? And now that she's finally with me, you did this, how can I not be angry"
Mingi said, as San stood speechlessly, your eyes teared up, hearing him say that

"You what?"

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