Swanqueen

Chapter 8 - making the decision

Emma's point of view

It's been three days since me and Regina confessed how we both feel and know I need to make the decision do I stay with Killian and be happy or do I go with Regina wear I can feel both happy and loved, well yes I feel loved by Killian but the feelings I get from Regina are just wow.

But all I can think about is if whoever I decide I will hurt the other and I know that Regina 'that I won't hurt her with my decision' but it still worries me as I care about her but I also care about Killian as well as we plan of having kids in the future and with Regina well we haven't had that talk yet hopeful one day if I choose her.

Emma flops at her desk in her office and sighs "Why must this be so hard I just need to make a decision" As soon as she says that as hears a voice coming from outside her office and remembers she isn't allowed and that her dad and chosen to come into work today to give snow some mother son time.

Emma walks out of her office and sighs again "Oh sorry Dad I thought you had gone out already on the portal". He stands up and walks over to Emma places a hand on her arm responds with a worried tone and looks on his face "Yeah just about to pop out now, also is everything ok you seem a little distracted today".

Emma puts on a fake smile and looks down "Yeah dad I'm fine just can't decide on what to have for lunch today". Emma pauses and continues but in a quiet tone so that her dad doesn't hear "Oh and I am also thinking of who I love more Killian or Regina and thinking of who I should choose ''.

David lets go of Emma's arm and then walks towards the door but before he leaves he turns around and says "Well whatever you decide it will make sure it is the decision that makes you happy because right now you don't see it".

Emma is shocked by her dad's words even though she knows he was talking about what she was going to choose for lunch she also takes it as if he was talking about her decision about her choice between who she loves more.

It's the end of Emma's shift at the station and she is getting ready to leave when suddenly she feels someone grab her by her waist without thinking or looking to see who it is first she says "Regina you're not making this decision any easier for me".

As soon as she finishes her sentence she feels the grip around her waist loosen and she spins around to find a confused Kilian who questions her "Emma why do you mean when you said 'Regina you're not making this any easier, what isn't she making easy".

Emma mentally kicking herself tries to come up with a quick answer and decides it best to change the subject, responds "Oh Killian I didn't know you were coming by the office today". Killian looking confused and slightly angry says "Emma don't change the subject and tell me why you just said Regina, also you knew I was coming as I'm taking you out for dinner".

Emma sighs and walks over to the bench by the window and sits down patting the spot next to her indicating for Killian to sit next to her but he walks over to her and says with slightly more of an angry tone in his voice "No Emma I'm not sitting down now tell me why you said Regina's now or we are not leaving this office".

Emma places her head in her hands and starts to cry "I - I can't tell you, I don't want to hurt you". Killian bends down in front of Emma places both his hands on hers and in a low tone says "Emma whatever you need to tell me just say it because you're starting to worry me".

Emma looks up at Killian who now has a concerned look on his face which makes Emma feel much more horrible than she already did "Killian I need to tell you something but you need to promise me you won't get mad even if want I'm about to tell you will be hard for you to both understand and hear".

Killian, now more concerned than ever, stands up and sighs "I love you and will never be mad at you". Emma stands up and walks over to Killian takes his hands in her and looks down so she isn't making eye contact as she doesn't want to see his reaction and starts "ok Killian i want to start by saying I never wanted any of this to happen and I didn't mean for this to go this far but I can't take it anymore it is breaking me apart and it is killing me ...".