The Faults in the Universe's Stars: The Fault in Our Stars Companion Book

The Fanfic- The Fault in Never Letting Go

Author's Note
If you have made it this far, congratulations. The hardest part starts on the next page. Before we begin, I would like to mention a few things;
First,
The events that are about to take place are my opinion on what may have happened. They are not meant to go against or offend others based on their beliefs. However, I cannot, and will not promise that the following pages of my work will not upset you because the words my own fingers have typed have upset and affected me. That is my goal. To affect you. To change you. To carve my own place in you as a person. 
So, I am taking back my previous warning for a REACTION is what I seek, desire, and hope to receive.
Next,
Answers that are desirable are rarely given to those who seek it. If you are looking for an ending that will make you feel all happy and fuzzy inside. You may not enjoy what I have written.
However, I expect criticism to arise for it shows that you care enough about the words I have written and that I have received the reaction I wanted.
Finally, some information about the story you are about to read;
It is from the perspective of Augustus Waters after he dies.
I truly hope you enjoy the story,
Thank you, 
Ruhi Thukral

The Fault in Never Letting Go
My eyes open and I clutch my chest, but the pain that  always followed my unfortunate awakening never arrived. My eyes clenched,  I sat up, slowly in case I jerked the pain back, and waited for the stabbing to come. It never came. I open one eye then the next. I jump up, throwing a fist in the air. I look down and realize I must have slept in my prosthetic last night. I shrugged it off. Maybe my parents forgot to take it off after I tried to walk the other day. Suddenly, I yell,
"Hazel! Hazel I'm okay. The cancer, the cancer's gone! I love you. I'm oka-"
I stop. The world stops. In my shock of feeling better, I didn't realize. Stupid. Stupid stupid stupid. I look around, really taking in my surroundings for the first time. White. Empty. I was trapped. I tried to find the end of this room.
"Hazel. Hazel, I'm coming. Don't worry. I'm coming." I started getting frantic. There's no end. There is no end. THERE IS NO END!
"HAZEL!" Sweat started dripping from my brow and my breathing picked up its pace. I defeated cancer but what was the point without Hazel? Suddenly, I had the vague feeling that I was being watched. I turned around and almost bumped into this little girl
"Shhhh. Be at peace Augustus Waters."
Before I could start the interrogation process, my eyes started to droop and then they closed.
All I could think about is Hazel. Her hair. Her eyes. Her lips. Then it all turned red and my head started to hurt. My eyes whipped open and I saw the same little girl.
""Who are you? What did you do to Hazel?"
All I could see was red. Hazel. I will find you.
A small, high pitched, sweet voice spoke, "Hello, Augustus Waters. I understand that you have many questions. First, let me introduce myself."
"I don't care about that! Tell me where Hazel is or it will get painful for the both of us." I said and my voice brought a new definition to the word scathing. However, the little girl didn't even falter and she just continued,
"My name is Emmrett. I am here to welcome you Mr. Waters."
"Welcome me? Welcome me where? Where is Hazel?"
"Welcome you, Mr. Waters, to the cold, embracing, escape that is death."
My vision started to go blurry. Dead. I was dead. I left Hazel. I'm dead. My eyelashes were clogged with tears and before I knew it, my face was soaking wet. I didn't realize, but at some point within the past 5 minutes, I had fallen to my knees. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. A small, cold, lifeless hand rested on my shoulder. I look up and see, what was her name? Emily? No. Elly. No. Emmrett? Yeah. Emmrett.
"I understand this is hard."
Suddenly, I was mad. No irate. I was irate.
"How could you possibly know what I'm going through?!"
Those words sent a pain through my chest. Those were the words I wanted to tell everyone. Back when I was alive.
I felt a hard thump on my shoulder and I turned to see a pair of blazing eyes. Eyes full of so much anger that they made me cower slightly.
"How do I know? HOW DO I KNOW? I'm DEAD Augustus."
"Don't call me that! That's what Hazel calls-no-called me."
Emmrett's face stayed the same, but something in her eyes softened She bit her lip softly and then, as if she was unsure she said, "Mr.Waters, I shouldn't be doing this, but if you swear on her life that you won't speak of this again and that you will listen to me, you can see her. One. Last. Time."
My jaw dropped and my eyes widened.
I didn't realize that my fists were clenched until they opened and I saw the indents my nails made on my skin.
"Yes. Yes of course I want to see her! Is that even a question?"
"Fine. Follow me."
She held out her hand and I grabbed it. Though I was dead, grabbing onto her hand made me feel dirty inside. I'm sorry Hazel. I'm coming.
"Close your eyes."
I did and when they opened again, I saw her.
"Hazel, Hazel, I'm here,"
I reached out to touch her face but Emmrett grabbed my hand before it touched her skin.
"She can't see, hear, or feel you."
My eyes closed in pain. At some level I think I knew that but a part of me wished that she could. I mean I always thought I would know if I was dead, so if I was wrong about that, why not this? I  then looked at what was happening and fell back. I saw tears on her face. She was crying. Why? I turned slightly and saw my casket. I took a sharp breath in. My funeral. Of course.
"I'm so sorry Hazel. I'm so, so sorry." I started crying in earnest now. I knew she couldn't hear me but the thing is, it was like she knew. My eyes opened wide when I heard her say,
"It's okay. You hear me? It's okay."
Emmrett's voice was frantic as she said, "Shoot. Shoot, shoot, shoot. Sorry Mr. Waters. We need to go. NOW."
She held out her hand and I grabbed it as I saw her kiss my lifeless face. The last time I heard her voice, she was whispering, "I love you, Augustus Waters. I love you."
Love. Not loved. Love.
"I love you too, Hazel Grace. Forever and Always."
Then the scene went black as Emmrett took me back to the white room.
"Mr. Waters, I'm so sorry."
"Why? You just met me. I'm nothing to you."
"Well, that's not entirely true."
What? How is that not true? She just met me.
"I think it's time I tell you something, Mr. Waters."
"Go on then," I said bracing myself for I don't know what. The worst has already happened. I left Hazel.
"Well, I actually have to tell you four things. 1. This afterlife, if you will, exists in a timeless dimension. Actually, to be specific, it's a star. 2. Multiple dimensions intersect here and combine their dead and when it overflows, the star dies. No one knows what happens after that. 3. The reason that you only see me here is because family members from all dimensions can see each other. At least until after this initial integration," as she spoke, I could feel my heart beating in my chest. What is she going to say next?
"This leads me to my last point," she continued and for a split second I thought I saw fear on her face, "4. My name is Emmrett Grace Waters, Dad."
Crazy. This girl was absolutely crazy. But. I looked at her a little closer. Hazel eyes, brown hair. Just like Hazel. And her right leg. There was something odd about it. Her hands reached down to her leg and she took off the prosthetic.
"I have osteosarcoma just like you Dad. Just like how you gave me your retinoblastoma."
I took a step back. How could this be possible?
"How is this possible?" I blurted.
"In the dimension I am from you and Mom, Hazel, both recovered. You grew up, got married, and boom. I was born. 5 years later I was diagnosed. A year after that you died in a car crash. Two more years passed and I appeared here. Other you was transported to another star and it died, so it has been just me since I came here."
"You died at 8?"
"Yeah."
My hand flew to my mouth.
"Oh."
"I'm alone. I always have been. And I always will be."
"No. You are my child somewhere, and more importantly, you were Hazel's. You will not be alone as long as I'm here."
I looked at her little face and once again, I grabbed her hand. As we walked off, I saw her disintegrate.
"You did well." She said, and I felt her blow away in the dust and soon I joined her. Finally at peace. 

If you want to be an angel, you've got to do it while you're alive. Be good and do good things.
~ Ricky Gervoia