Chapter 5: Dancing with Specters

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**TRIGGER WARNING: You'll be seeing Calli's attack from Bash's POV**

My search came to an end when the others finished their meals. I was ready to get out of here. It meant one step closer to leaving to find Calliope. It also meant one minute closer to when I could get some of that forbidden substance and take a roll. I've done E a few times, so I know what to expect. Since I was dreaming so easily about her, I had no doubt I'd be able to see her.

The limo ride to the club was short, and I spent most of it drinking whiskey while scrolling through my phone. It's not like I'd have a hangover in the morning for this. It would probably take as much as needed to put down an elephant to feel anything the next day. No, he would get enough for a trip of thirty minutes to a few hours. Maybe this will be what helps me get through the night and the meeting tomorrow. I don't care how long it takes me to find her once I'm near her, but I know it won't be long. I do not doubt that once I'm close to her, I'll be able to sense and smell her. Hopefully, Stefan can keep my mind clear from trying to claim her when I meet her. I needed to do this the right way. She deserved the best, and I've never done romance properly. I was going to make sure I would for her.

I was the last in the limo at the restaurant, so I was the first out once we arrived at the club. While showing up in a limo is undoubtedly one way to get a nod from the bouncer, the pack owned this club. We walked right in without being stopped. I heard several women try to call out for one of our attention, hoping we'd let them in with us. One of the others may have stopped, but I headed straight for the private seating area we kept. We settled in as the waitress was already arriving with our usual drinks. I gave Brooke, one of the ones I know reasonably well, a polite smile as she handed me a glass. She was one of the members of the pack, a Lambda. She helped manage the bar when the primary owner was busy.

"Thanks," I sipped the drink. I used my heightened vision to search the crowd. I didn't see my usual dealer here, but I wasn't surprised. He usually moved from place to place. There was always one around. It was easy to pick them out once you laid your eyes on them.

Typically, they had big smiles like they were the friendliest guys in the world, even if they could kill a regular person without blinking or guilt. They also dressed well because they could afford to. Girls were always hanging off of them, looking for money or a supply of some fun.

"I'm gonna go dance," I told the others without looking at them once my eyes landed on a guy I knew. I have bought from him before, so I knew he'd either have some or point me in the right direction.

"There's something weird with him tonight," I heard Liam say as I left them.

"You have no idea," Terry agreed as their voices faded into the background noise.

I gritted my teeth as I made my way through the crowd. The only one who understood me at the moment was Stefan. Tammi probably would have if I had opened up to her. I wasn't ready to see any judgment on anyone's face. Would they even believe there might have been a chance that bonded mates could have come back for me? Would they hate that it could be happening to me? It's not like I was the best guy out there. There were plenty of Lycans more deserving than me.

Self-doubt ate at me. Was I even worthy of Calliope and the chance she was my bonded mate? What did I ever do in my life that was so worthy of her? I was a warrior, but I followed orders. I didn't lead. I was a failure at so many business adventures. What could I do to prove my worth to her?

"Hey, Bastian!" I turned to meet the brown eyes of Shaun, the man I knew could find me what I was looking for.

I lifted my chin in greeting, "'Sup, Shaun." I reached in my pocket for a wad of cash I kept just for this moment. "You got some Skittles for me?"

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