♡Hazbin Hotel Oneshots♡

⛧Adam⛧

(this one's for you sinners)

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Popsicles
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Heaven is currently having a heatwave, why you ask?
Who the fuck knows, I sure don't- it's not like I'm up there.

Anyways... You are walking down the golden streets while fanning yourself off with your hand, sweat drips from your body as you frown deeply at the hot weather.

Your eyes are squinted as the sun blinds you from above, you look around trying to find somewhere cooler to be.

You notice a shop that is run by an angel you've met before, it's a small convenience store with a multitude of items to buy.

You enter the shop and look at the array of snacks and random food stuff, your eyes glance towards a small freezer, there's only a single blue twinscicle at the bottom.

You quickly open the freezer and reach to grab the frozen delicacy, but someone else grabs at it too "the fuck?" You growl and look over to see a large male angel with golden wings.
Or if you would rather call him "the Popsicle thief"

You slowly start to tug at the cold snack trying to take what is so rightfully yours "uhm-, so this is actually mine."

"Uh- I think the fuck not." He says and hugs it towards himself. The combination of heat, desperation, and annoyance start to bubble to the top.
Like a pot of vegetable soup about to boil over the sides and sizzle on the stove.

"Well, you're fucking wrong!" You spit in annoyance and sneer at him while tightening your grip on the twinscicle.

"Ugh!? What the fuck, don't you know who I am bitch? I'm Adam, the first fucking man!" He says and tightens his grip as well.

"I don't give a shit who you are asshole." You growl and pull the Popsicle towards yourself, he does the same in return.
The cycle repeats itself until it escalated to the point the two of you were ready to throw hands.

But then, "excuse me, I would rather not have a fight in my store... Maybe the two of you would consider sharing?" The owner of the store breaks up the argument awkwardly and smiles "it's on the house if you just take the argument somewhere else." The smile grows more nervous.

You think about it for a moment and shrug "free shit is free shit." You say and pull both Adam and the Popsicle out of the store.

Adam quickly opens the twinscicle and swipes his tongue over the whole thing with a loud "HA BITCH! It's mine now!"

You hiss and grab his wrists to bring the twinscicle to your mouth so you could give it a nice slurp for yourself.

"What the FUCK- that was kinda hot-" Adam laughed softly, that was until you took a large chomp of the twinscicle "h-hey! Total bitch move!" He shrieks and pulls the quarter eaten frozen stick away from you.

"Not my problem." You say and lean towards him to get more of the tasty snack.
"Fuck you!" He says and backs up.

"If you're so cocky, you should do it yourself pussy!" You blurt out and tackle him to reach the blue raspberry Popsicle.

"W-what? What the fuck?" Adam looks at you with a mix of confusion and... arousal?
You slowly start to compute what you said, you blush but shrug and steal the Popsicle from him.

You go to get up and leave but as you do, Adam grabs you and pulls you to the ground, now assuming the position you were in before.

In a moment of panic, you stick the entire Popsicle in your mouth and just stare into his eyes.
"Bitch-" he says before squeezing your cheeks together with one hand before pressing his lips to yours.

He presses his tongue into your mouth as an attempt to get some of the Popsicle.
You push back, he grunts irritated while you growl angrily at him.

The Popsicle slowly melts in the both of yours mouths but neither of you backs away, if anything, you've started getting into it.

"Is that offer from earlier still valid?" You tease with heavy breaths.

"Fuck yes."

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(Then you went back to his place and fucked, it was awesome.)
Next chapter will be the full bit ⁄⁠(⁠⁄⁠ ⁠⁄⁠•⁠⁄⁠-⁠⁄⁠•⁠⁄⁠ ⁠⁄⁠)⁠⁄

(⁠●⁠_⁠_⁠●⁠) Yippee