"What did I forget now?" Shivaay asked as he kept the grocery bag on the kitchen counter. Sahil and Anika peeked in to check his shopping.
Anika lightly clapped her hands and showed him the long list on the phone. "Nothing much. Just 11 things out of this list."
Sahil pointed at his temple. "Wah. Progress."
"Oh shut up you two!" Shivaay chuckled and walked out to the living room. He sat down on the couch and busied himself with the newspaper.
Life wasn't perfect yet. To be honest, he knew that his life was never going to be perfect. No matter how much he tried to move on, no matter how much he tried to douse the fire, tried to run away; he would always fail. He was always going to be haunted by the betrayal of his own. The gaping hole in his chest would never heal. But he could pretend to be well for the two people who had been there for him unconditionally.
Every single time he looked at Anika and Sahil, he felt like staying aback. He didn't know if God existed or not but he had seen and experienced God's kindness and love through them. He was grateful. He smiled only for them.
"You have to drive me to the event by the way." Anika came out wearing her earrings. Quite impulsively, they both had bought a second-hand Honda car together. "Or you know what? I will drive. You just tag along."
Shivaay knew what Anika was trying to do. She always tried to get him out of the house. He hated it but didn't mind relenting. His consultancy freelancing was going great. No one knew the truth about him getting ousted from his family's empire. So it was exciting for people to know that he was doing this and promptly sought his help. He conducted most meetings online. But that also meant that he stayed at home most of the time.
"Okay." He folded the newspaper and neatly placed it aside. "I will get dressed."
She grinned. "Go on."
The numb languidness that had settled in his limbs from the day he left his home had overstayed. It took him herculean effort to pick a new shirt and then wear it. Even closing the buttons felt like a task. It took everything in him to sit in the car. The thoughts of bumping into someone familiar, their impending questions about him missing from their Industry, the surprise on seeing him with a girl...Shivaay shuddered and reached out for the bottle of water. His hands shook yet again.
"Easy..." Anika instructed as she helped him have the water.
He almost chuckled. All this wasn't supposed to be so tough. He wasn't supposed to be this weak and useless. He was supposed to be ruthless. Emotionless. He was supposed to be a person who had no heart. He was not supposed to feel all these dastardly emotions, the pitless grief, the hurt eating his bones. All this was worthless.
His throat constricted. "Stop staring at me, Anika."
She briefly moved her eyes to the road but her worried gaze was back on him. Shivaay closed his eyes. Then he assured her. "I am not having a panic attack. I am just overwhelmed. I will be fine. Trust me. You focus on the drive."
"Okay." Her answer was clipped but she did reach out for his hand and held it for the rest of their journey.
*********************
"Why are you sitting here?" Anika gasped as she pulled him up from the floor.
They had reached their event venue and she had promptly got busy with the numerous arrangements. She had asked Shivaay to be around her but after a while, he had vanished. She didn't have the time to go after him. Now that the work was coming to an end, she searched for him and found him sitting on the stairs in a corner.
