Woso Oneshots

Talking, Alessia Russo.

I'm not sure where this is going, but I'm bored and not tired enough to sleep, so I'm writing instead.

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Y/ns pov.

I've always hated talking about my feelings. I mask my emotions by pretending to be loud and energetic all of the time. It's tiring, but it works. It has been for years, and no one seemed to notice. That is until my girlfriend Alessia came into my life. For the past few months, she's been trying to get me to talk to her, and I hate it. I hate it so much.

She wants to know all of these things, like why I don't drink and why I don't express my emotions. Now, I'm not going to lie, her constantly being on my back about this. It's really affecting my mood. Making me more angry than I normally am.

I love her, but I wish she would leave me alone sometimes.

I get snapped out of my thoughts by a tap on the shoulder.

'You okay y/n/n.' Kim asks, sitting down next to me on the bench I'm sat on.

Practically, the entire team is staring at me, and it's extremely embarrassing.

My knee starts to jump up and down, something I've been doing since school. I've never been able to stop it. It just happens.

'Yeah, I'm always ok.' I tell her, putting on my normal smirk, a smirk I've been faking for years.

Alessia sends me a worried glance, and Kim taps me on the back and gets back to training, me following after her.

The rest of training is a blur, and soon enough, Less and I are back home. I immediately go up to my room to try and calm down, knowing she will want to talk again.

I sit on my bean bag and watch the usual suspects, another film that reminds me of my dad. Funny story actually, the first time I watched it, he bet me a tenner I couldn't guess who the dude was and I guessed it straight away.

There is a knock on the door, and it opens slightly. Alessia walks in and closes it again.

I keep my focus on the film, hoping she will drop it and leave me alone.

'I know you've seen me, love.' She says after a few minutes. I still don't reply.

Sometimes, I just want to be left alone. It's probably not healthy because that allows my brain to tell me things, but hey, what can you do.

She sits down next to me and rubs my back. I have my hood up to try and hide the eye bags. They've come back since I started drinking energy drinks again.

I keep my mouth shut and keep my focus on the film.

'Please just talk to me y/n, I can help, but you've got to let me.' She sighs.

I turn to look at her, finally taking my eyes off of the screen.

'I don't need help, Alessia. I'm fine. Stop acting like I'm all fragile and need looking after all of the time.' I tell her, getting increasingly agitated and messing with my fingers.

She takes hold of my hands and looks me in the eye.

'Let me help you, y/n.' She says, never breaking eye contact.

I don't reply, I'm scared that if I open my mouth, it might all flood out. Lessi can't see me like this. No one can. Instead, I get up and leave the house, taking no notice of Alessias' attempts at getting me to come back.

I walk for what feels like forever before finding myself at a small corner shop. I go in and buy myself a few 50p energy drinks to calm down. It's probably not the best idea, but that doesn't matter right now.

I sit on a bench and start drinking one. Seeing as I don't drink, everyone treats this stuff like my alcohol so if someone on the team catches me, I'm dead.

'Y/n, what do you think you're doing.' Shit. Kim.

'Nowt?' I say it comes off more like a question. By this point, she's already thrown my drinks in the bin and clipped me round the back of the head. I didn't even have time to protest.

I'm not getting out of this one.

'Tell me why Leah has had Alessia crying on the phone, and the whole team has been looking for you for five hours.' Wait, FIVE HOURS I didn't know I'd been gone that long.

I shrug, not in the mood to be my normal sarcastic self.

She sighs.

'Come on, let's get you home.'

The rest of the walk home is silent. I wish people would just stop bothering about me and just leave me to do what I normally do because, as I said, it's been working for years.

We get to mine and Alessia's house, and as soon as I walk in, I get slapped round the head by Leah.

'You worried the fuck out of us.' She says, I can hear the relief in her voice.

'Sorry.' I mumble, this day has been alot.

Once Lessi realises I'm here, she immediately runs into my arms. She rests her head on my shoulder snd we just stand there for a while, everyone staring at us or rather, at me.

Alessia pulls away and starts hitting me repeatedly in the chest.

'Never do that again, I was so fucking scared.' This is when I know I went to far, Lessi never swears.

I grab her hands so she will stop hitting me and guide her to sit on the sofa.

I go to the front of the room and prepare myself for what I'm about to say. Having all of these eyes on me is not very nice. I close my eyes and take a deep breath.

'Right, this is going to be hard to say, so please bear with me.' I take another deep breath and everyone's focus is now completely on me. 'I need help, I'm not okay. I haven't been okay since I was about twelve, and I'm admitting it now.' Tears start to form in my eyes, a rare occurrence. 'Um, I don't know how to handle my emotions and shit so I just pretend I don't have any. I thought it worked, but it turns out it just makes everything worse.' By this point, I can't speak anymore, and I'm full on sobbing. I feel like such a twat, just spilling all this shit onto everyone. I've never been like this and it's really confusing.

I feel a pair of arms wrap around around me and I bury my head into their chest.

'Let's sit down y/n/n.' It's Lessi.

We sit down and everyone is sat in a circle around me, giving sympathetic looks but also slightly smiling.

'What are you lot smiling at?' I ask as I stop crying.

'We're just glad you can talk to us y/n.' Steph tells me.

'Well, don't expect it all of the time. That was stressful.' I chuckle.

'We'll get you some help, kid, don't worry.' Kim smiles slightly.

Now for the hard part, actually talking about it.

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Idk, started it last night, it's abit shorter than normal.

Mase. :)