Caraphernelia

Five

He looked shocked, but almost relieved at seeing me. 'Oh.. hey Scout.' I noticed he was with a woman who was talking to Miss Rowland, the IT teacher. 'What're you doing here?' I asked - I didn't see this coming. Like, at all.

'Um; well.. I'm starting school again.' He told me with a small chuckle. My eyebrows raised. 'Really? You sure?' I knew that was something I should'nt have said because his eyes filled with pain again and he looked down. My brain shouting at me, I frantically tried to come up with something to erase what had just spilled out.

'Oh, shit - Vic I didn't mean that I - fuck, Vic I'm sorry!'

'No. Don't be. You're right. Its a stupid idea.' As I tried to protest he ran out of the room. I heard people's cries and footsteps clattering down the hallway. The door slammed shut, leaving me standing there facing his mothers back. 'Vic..' I said quietly, my voice broken and guilt settling in my stomach like an anchor.

When the door slammed the woman turned around and made eye contact with me accidentally. 'Did-did he just run out?' She asked me, horrified. Feeling extremely guilty I nodded. That was all she needed because she left Miss Rowland in mid sentence running out of the room in search of Vic.

~~~~~~~~VIC'S POV~~~~~~~~

I knew I should'nt have asked to go back to school! I knew it, but I persuaded myself to anyway - I thought maybe Scout would think it was a good idea. God; I'm such a fucking IDIOT! Jesus, why did I let myself do that? I rubbed my forehead with both palms and looked around me.

After I had run out I had just exited the school and ran for as long as I could stand. It then occurred to me that I probably should've paid attention to where I was running to, because I didn't recognize where I was at all; and that made me scared. But I was too pissed at myself to do anything else except just sit on the ground leaning against a tree that I found.

Still feeling annoyed and angry at myself, my hands and feet made their way into the tree. I climbed up and found myself in the tree. 'She sits up high, surrounded by the sun. One million branches and she loves every one.'

Words were scribbled down in my sketchbook; words that made me feel different. Not okay, just different. There were some stains on the paper - I didn't know if it had rained or I had cried. I didn't know if I was bleeding or the pages always been stained with red. In my desperate scribble to get down my thoughts I forgot I was in a tree and I could fall. I wasn't sure about anything until my limp body hit the ground.

'What happened?' I asked no-one. No-one replied. I felt comfortable; more comfortable than I had felt in a long time. My eyes were barely open, but I could see the grass and the trunk of the tree beside me. Legs curled losely up to me and arms were bent and my fingers touched my lip. They felt wet.

I think I fell asleep despite the crippling pain slowly emerging in my back. It wasn't until the sun was in the opposite side of the sky that I heard the familiar sound. The scream when they realised there was a boy there, just lying. Then they would hurry over to me and try to console me while they called the ambulance. Before it came they would simply wait with me and say words that should be comforting but just sounded unsure.

Then the ambulance would arrive and after giving statements about what happened they would clear off because they didn't want to be in my presence any longer. They'd then go home under the false pretence that they'd 'saved a life'. No. They would never save me.

Reason being; the person to save me would be the person to help me recover. Until then, my life would remain in jeopardy.

I had a feeling that person would be Scout.

I felt a need to open up to her and say everything I needed to. The only thing was; I didn't know exactly what it was that I needed to say. She already knew, just maybe not the full extent.. I guess I just wanted some help.