Between light and darkness (adamsapple)

Definition of love

Definition of love

Adam knew he had crossed a line, but he felt unable to restrain himself. He regretted it as soon as the words escaped his lips, but it was as if a wave of anger, accumulated since the day he woke up alone in that bed, had suddenly burst forth. Was he trying to be kind? After making him relive that feeling of abandonment? What a hypocrite.

There were no misunderstandings; after hearing Lucifer's explanation, Adam understood that he didn't intend to hurt him. But that didn't excuse or explain why he thought it was a good idea to leave him alone after a night in which they shared so much, in which both were so vulnerable with each other after so long. All he needed was time and space, but Lucifer hadn't granted him that, which is why his venomous words came out uncontrollably. He had been on autopilot for days, but now, when he finally wanted to be alone, he couldn't achieve it. At that moment, he didn't care how Lucifer felt; he needed to vent his anger.

If something broke inside him when he saw the expression on Lucifer's face after hearing his words, that was not our concern. Adam decided to take a shower and then go out into the garden; at least he knew the palace well enough to take a nighttime stroll and clear his head. That's all he needed: a few days without Lucifer.

He headed to the bathroom and stripped off his clothes as the bathtub filled. He left his wings spread out as he looked at himself in the mirror. He felt uncomfortable seeing horns instead of his halo; he had to admit they didn't look bad on him, although of course, what didn't look good on him. He stroked the small horns; he needed to touch them to understand that they were real and not a hallucination. Then the memory of Lucifer's caresses, so gentle, so passionate, came to his mind... and his stomach turned.

With that thought in mind, he submerged himself in the bathtub, letting the water relax his muscles and his agitated heart. Surely Lucifer would be fine; he didn't think it would affect him too much. In a few days, it would pass, and he would be back to keeping an eye on him twenty-four hours a day. When that happened, Adam thought, he would be ready to talk and, perhaps, fix things... He would take care of his redemption at another time. When he told Lucifer he wanted to redeem himself as soon as possible, he did it out of his own anger; he was no longer in a hurry. After the heaven had not cared about him... Adam wasn't stupid; he knew heaven was aware of his fall. The fact that they hadn't reached out to him, not even Lute, made him reconsider the time he had spent there.

It was ironic that the only one who had cared about him was his supposed enemy, with whom he had shared mutual hatred throughout eternity.

Adam emerged from the bathtub an hour later, dressed in a robe he found in the closet, and left the room. The palace was enveloped in silence, only interrupted by the whisper of infernal creatures and occasionally some distant screams. Although hell differed from heaven in many aspects, it had its own charm. Adam descended the stairs and sat in front of the fountain, watching the creatures that inhabited it as they circled and fought each other. Where could Lucifer have gone?

Hell had a peculiar temperature; it wasn't suffocating, but it was warm. In heaven, the seasons changed, but here it seemed like time had stopped, and somehow he liked that. The warmth... it reminded him of Eden, evoking mixed feelings.

He remembered the first time he saw Lucifer after a nap in the gardens of Eden. It seemed like yesterday when he fell asleep under a tree and woke up to find a figure, seemingly human but imbued with a divine aura, staring at him intently. Their gazes met, and his heart skipped a beat. They were both mesmerized by each other, with a mix of curiosity and anticipation, thus marking the beginning of their strange and distorted relationship.

The déjà vu sensation upon waking up after being killed in the extermination had been overwhelming.

From the moment he was pierced with the dagger, everything was blurry in his mind, but he remembered some things clearly. Like Lute's voice shouting and his blurred face, the cannibals smelling him as if they were about to enjoy the feast of their lives thanks to him. At that moment, he felt tempted to give up; he was ready to die when something inside him adamantly refused. He opened his eyes with effort and looked around, not knowing exactly what he was looking for or where to look until his eyes met Lucifer's.