Calypso

9 years old

Have you ever had the feeling that you're different? 

Because I have. Quite a lot, actually. I've counted 3 times in total. 

Difference number 1 was when my dad started talking about boyfriends once at dinner. I loved seeing people in love, but I could never imagine me liking someone! Plus, I'm only 9! 

But they were talking and I had a question. I thought it was a good question. But my parents had other ideas. I had said 'What happens if a girl likes a girl?'. When I asked it, my mum stood up from her seat, and looked me dead in the eye. 

She said 'It's wrong, horrible, disgusting, and not normal, that's what it is!'

And then she left the room with a huff. I'm now worried if I grow up to ever like a girl. 

Difference number 2 was when my dad was dropping me off at a piano lesson. My mum said that they were a waste of time and effort, but my dad liked me playing music, so he always took me to them. It was a long drive, about 40 minutes. So, my dad took the chance to have one of those 'important chats' with me. It was about kindness and growing up. Usually, chats about kindness and growing up are good chats. But not this time. 

He said something like:

'I know you like making other people happy, and being a kind girl. And sometimes, that's a good thing. But as you grow up, you will realise that to have a good career, marriage, family, life, you sometimes need to be a little mean, to get what you want. And being mean is just a part of life. And you need to learn to be mean to others, otherwise, you'll never get anywhere.' 

And being the dog I am, I talked back. I said something like:

'But being kind gives you friendships, memories, and lifelong lessons! It even makes your tail wag! Why would being mean get you anything?'

My dad just shook his head. He said something like: 'You'll understand when you're older.'

I hate when grown ups say that. 

Difference number 3 was when we had a career day at school. Being the stuck up try hard my mum is, she just had to come in and talk about how being the CEO of a huge company is the best job in the world, and how we're so great. She talked about how to get a good job, you need good friends, a focused mindset, and an ambitious attitude. I actually agreed with her for some of the things she said. But then... she said that you need a worthwhile job, like a CEO or an engineer, not like a musician, dancer, or artist. 

And the worst part was, that she looked directly at Brandy when she said it. 

It was at the moment I decided that when I grow up, I want to be hardworking, but also teach people good life lessons. Not like this stuff my mum is talking about to a bunch of 9 years olds...