Poetry

Going crazy ⚠️

I've gone crazy ,
My memories have gone hazy,

I don't know how to react
My body isn't ready for the impact
Of my heavy feelings
So I try prepare staring at the bland white ceiling,

I feel like ripping my face off with my hands
I feel like laughing
I feel like crying
I feel like pulling out my hair
While crying out in despair
I feel like I need to be forgiven
So I try keep my past hidden
I feel like I need revenge
But I don't know who to avenge
I feel manic
Sending my body in a panic
Although my brain can't comprehend
How I might drive myself to my end
Scratching at my eye
While telling a white lie
Droplets of red blood are forming
Memorise keep tormenting
My foot is bouncing up and down
Too harsh on this white ground
The red alarm goes off
My brain has had more than enough
People rushing in towards me
My vision turns red and I can't see

Bright white lights on my face,
And I wake up in another bare white place,

Each of my arms bound to a different side,
Could they have taken anymore of my pride.

Now my head is fuzzy and unclear
My brain filled with fear

Thrown in a cage with a clear window
So I show

My true craziness
While being the quietest
Throwing myself on the white wall
Yet no red droplets will fall
Because my room is more padded
My hairs getting more matted
I can't do this anymore I just can't
I look scary and gaunt
The glass gleams once again for me to see
What they have made me be
A vile animal
With no control
A true villain
My head burst into a million

I can see a different colour but it's hard to describe
It looks like how I should feel inside

Dark and empty
I don't know how old I am , maybe twenty

My thoughts feel more deranged
It feels strange

What happened to my brother
And my mother

I remember the accident
It was my predicament

Now I know why I'm here and bound
Not able to make a sound

It's probably for the best
I just hope now I can rest.