Finding My Way

Chapter 18

I don't know long I've been kissing Kaname, but eventually we both need to come up for air. Despite his earlier attitude, he did not seem inclined to bring anything beyond kissing. Not that I'm really complaining, his kisses set my world on fire.

Breathing deeply, we both look at each other. My arms are wrapped tightly around his shoulders and he's bracing himself on the couch so that he doesn't crush me. He smiles sadly at me and maneuvers us so that I'm sitting on his lap again. I keep my arms wrapped around him and rest my head in the crook between his neck and shoulders.

"Why did you leave this room before, Yuki?" he asks me.

I play with the buttons on his coat. "The boy from earlier came by this room and then left all of a sudden," I say. Then I add, to clarify. "The vampire child who drained my energy."

"The child came to this room?" he asked, sounding puzzled. "Describe him to me."

"Hmm...let's see. He had dark brown hair. Kind of like mine," I say, trying to remember. "Actually, his hair reminded me of Senri's. His eyes were two different colors too. One gray, like Senri's, and one maroon. Like yours." Kaname had grown very still at my words. "Is he related to Senri do you think?" I ask.

Kaname seems lost in thought. "Kaname?" I ask. He looks down at me.

"Yuki. Rido has made his first move."

---

Zero walked out of the vampire soiree, relieved that was finally over. So many pretentious assholes all gathered together to talk about more pretentious shit, he thought, extremely disgruntled about the way he'd spent his night.

If he were honest with himself, he would know that his frustration went much deeper. He felt helpless in more ways than one. There was no way for him to keep Yuki safe and prevent her from dooming herself to a cursed life. Moreover, he had no idea how to save Maria.

He hadn't realized how much he enjoyed spending time with Maria until she was gone all of a sudden. Gone wasn't the right word, because her body was still around. But it wasn't Maria.

It was that woman.

If only he could kill her outright, but he didn't want to hurt Maria. He couldn't hurt Maria. He refused to believe she was gone. He clenched his fists in anger and sheer helplessness.

In his fury, he neglected to properly take in his surroundings as he'd been trained to do.

It was due to this neglect that he allowed himself to be open for capture.

---

Right after Kaname had dropped that bomb of news about Rido, Takuma had knocked and entered the room. I can't say that I was grateful for his appearance, but at least it hadn't been a few minutes earlier when we were making out. Even so, I suddenly feel very self-conscious to be so disheveled and sitting on Kaname's lap like that.

I make to stand up, but Kaname's hands tightened, holding me in place. "Stay, Yuki," he murmurs in my ear so that only I can hear. "I need you here. You're holding me together right now."

What else could I do? I wrap my arm around his back and sit with my legs across his to face Takuma. He seemed like his usual cheerful self, but I noticed a slight sadness in his eyes. I wonder what happened.

"Ah, Kaname. I thought I'd find you here," he says brightly. "The party seems to be winding down. Shall we bring Yuki back to the Academy?"

"Yes, Takuma," Kaname agrees. "You are quite right." He gathers me to his chest and squeezes me tightly. He buries his head into my neck and inhales deeply. Then he stands up, setting me down beside him. He grips my hand, as if not wanting us to be disconnected. I'm grateful for the touch and I grip his hand like a lifeline.