📺PUZZLEVISION PRESENTS: Once Upon an SMG4: SMG3 and The Tall Tale of Macro Four

Chapter 6: Castle Drama

Dear Diary:

Their was always two things I wanted in this world...

Money... and a friend.

And I finally managed to get both.
SMG3, a beautiful princess, had recently discovered my castle and found the one and only. What made him decide to enter my castle completely baffles me, but I don't care! I have only met him an hour ago, and I already feel attached. Is it wrong for a giant to have feelings for a princess? Not romantic ones, but... genuine feelings? I'm a brute. I'm not supposed to feel anything, so it's kinda scary for me to feel these things, especially since I have been trapped alone in a dusty, old, worn out castle for so long.

I've done a good deed though and stitched back up the princess's dress for him when it got destroyed. He seemed pretty pleased about it.
I wasn't. I could've done better... and I will.

Just as long as that guy leaves my castle. I hate him. That TV man. Theirs something about him that I really don't like. He seems pretty obsessed with wanting to kill me, which, to be honest, kind of unsettles me in a way. Even though I'm a hundred times his size, I can't help but fear him just a little. But... he's also the princess's friend. I can't just kill him. Even though he might kill me first anyway... It might come to a point where I'll have to do it. Not for my sickening pleasure... but for self defense.
That's pretty pathetic coming from a giant, isn't it?

And it's not only me I'm scared for... I'm also very worried about my new friend. I'm more worried about him than me. Where did this guy come from, and what does the princess honestly see in him? He seems like a sociopath who's obsessed with bloodshed. But that could be just me.
I'd hate to sound like a broken record, diary... but I really don't like this guy. But for the princess's sake... I'll have to deal with him. But if he tries anything funny... I'll give him some real wounds to think about.

-

SMG4 was walking back towards the treasure room of where the strange man was waiting. He had his usual grin on his face, which SMG4 couldn't help but find a little odd. He seemed pretty annoyed with me before... why was he suddenly fine now?
   "Oh, you're finally back." The TV had spoken. "And the princess is with you. In one piece on top of that. What a shocker." His tone was passive-aggressive.
SMG4 narrowed his eyes but he said nothing in response. Instead, he gently placed SMG3 back on the ground.
As soon as the TV man had noticed the patched up dress, he snorted a laugh. "Oh god, what the hell are you wearing?"
 SMG3 paid no mind to the insult and twirled his new dress in front of his friend. "Like it? The giant fixed it for me, unlike somebody ELSE I KNEW WHO HAD THE FULL CAPABILITY OF DOING IT FOR ME BUT DIDN'T!"
The man stopped laughing on the spot and rolled his eyes.
Urgh! That guy really makes my blood boil. Does he even care about the princess? Or does he only care about killing me?
   "Well princess, I don't recall taking care of you to be a responsibility of mine."
   "THAT LITERALLY IS YOUR RESPONSIBILITY!"
Mr Puzzles blinked and shook his head. "Nuh uh."
SMG3 snapped. "The fuck you mean Nuh uh?! Isn't that what we agreed on?!"
   "I didn't say that I was going to take care of you. I am simply assisting to protect you from this beast!" He shot a glare at SMG4.
   "Isn't that the same thing!" SMG3 shouted, flailing his arms.
   "No?"
SMG3 scoffed but didn't bother to continue the argument. He knew he wouldn't win it anyway.
SMG4 stared at the two as they glared at each other for a moment, before the TV had shook his head again, this time to show that he no longer wanted the confrontation to go on. "Look, I am happy for you by getting your dress repaired. But we have more important things to take care of."
SMG4 was the next to speak. He forced his tone to be tender with the stranger, but it still came out as a low growl. "I'll assist to take back the treasure and goods I stolen. It's the least I can do."
The TV's eyes widened. "NO!" 
Both SMG3 and SMG4 stared, baffled and perplexed, but they said nothing. Their was only the occasional blink by one of them.
  When the awkward silence dragged on long enough, Mr Puzzles coughed. "Ahem. I mean. You? Bring back the gold? Please! You're a giant! A brute! How could we trust you? How do we know you won't go down and attack?"
   "You don't know that," it was SMG3 who spoke. "He was kind enough to fix my dress. Isn't that enough of a 'sorry, can you guys forgive me for what I've done in the past?'"
Mr Puzzles snorted mockingly. "He was only nice to you because you're a princess!"
 Touche.
   "And plus, his killer instincts might flare up when he's actually on land."
   "Excuse me!" SMG4 finally snapped. He kneeled down to get to eye level with the stranger. "Listen Buddy. Just because I'm a giant, that doesn't make me a heartless brute, got it?"
  It was the TV's turn to object. "I beg to differ." He glanced over at SMG3. "Observe." He turned back towards SMG4 and patted the giant's nose. He almost immediately snapped at him like a vicious animal. Mr Puzzles took a few steps back.
With a smirk filled with pride, he turned back to face SMG3. "See?"
SMG3 blinked, but he had a blank expression on his face.
   "Okay, so maybe I don't like you!" The giant snapped. "But you can't just assume I'll act violent with any human I see!"
The TV shook his head. "You giants are all the same! With your pitiful lies and grumpy nature. It's pathetic."
   "WHO YOU CALLING PATHETIC!" The giant slammed one of his fists down on the ground, causing the ground to shake below him. SMG3 had snapped out of his trance.
The giant was huffing. "YOU SHOULD CONSIDER YOURSELF LUCKY THAT I HAVEN'T TORN YOU TO SHREDS YET! BECAUSE YOU'RE MAKING IT RATHER TEMPTING!"
SMG3 turned to see Mr Puzzle's reaction, horrified, but he didn't seem startled at all. In fact, he looked almost pleased...
   "That's more like it..."
 The giant blinked, his temper coming to an end. "What?" 
Instead of replying to the giant's question, the man turned back to face the princess. "Now do you understand? The giant simply cannot come with us, princess. More harm will come out of it than good."
"Well I'm sorry if I actually wanted to do something good for once!" SMG4 spat sarcastically. "Heaven forbid!" He threw his hands in the air in an over-exaggeration and got ready to leave on the spot.
SMG4 almost expected and even wanted SMG3 to stop him, but he didn't. He just stood there and stared.
That stupid TV has gotten into his head! Now he thinks I'm a savage brute! Which technically I am... BUT STILL!
   "Well that much is true I suppose, but how are we supposed to get all of this gold down the beanstalk in one go? Wouldn't it be a least a little bit more logical if the giant carried everything for us?"
SMG4 froze and blinked in surprise.
Mr Puzzles also froze. He immediately turned his head away, embarrassed, as if he had never thought of that before. "I... I suppose you're right..." His tone was gritty. "My mistake." He turned back towards the giant. "Fine. You can help us bring the treasure back."
The giant's eyes lit up.
   "BUT! On one condition..."
The light in SMG4's eyes immediately darkened, and he narrowed his eyes. "What?"
The man smiled. But it was an unsettling kind of smile. "Let us stay in your castle for a while."
The giant stepped back in disbelief. Why would he...?
"What!" SMG3 was the one who snapped aloud. "After you just saying that this giant was dangerous! And now you want us to stay in his castle? Have you lost your mind?"
   "Unless he thinks I'm giving it up!" The giant interrupted with a growl. "Which is never going to happen by the way!" SMG4 was so angry and shocked, he wasn't even offended by SMG3's protest.
The man shook his head. "No no no, of course not."
   "Then speak. What is your motive for wanting to stay at my castle?"
   "Why should I have a motive for anything?" His voice carried a relaxing tone to it. "Motives are overrated. People these days; always have to have a reason for something."
He's dodging the question again! How can one be full of shit, yet so convincing? And how can I want to rip him apart, yet be intrigued by what he says? This guy gives me very odd mixed signals.
  "You know It's quite rude to question one's motives anyway. Haven't you ever been told that?"
The giant narrowed his eyes. "No." 
   "Well... I guess that's no surprise, now is it?" 
SMG4 wasn't stupid. He knew for a fact that was completely intended to be an insult towards him. No doubt about it. Lets see how he likes it...
   "Well maybe if I had a TV for a head and a scrawny body, I'd know better."
The man gasped. "The audacity!"
SMG4 grinned triumphally.
   "Well maybe if I weren't such a giant doofus, I'd have some manners!"
   "Yeah, you're right..."
  Mr Puzzles looked taken a back. He blinked a confusion.
   "Maybe I should work on my manners... manner for the elderly!" 
 Mr Puzzle's confused expression immediately faltered and he exploded. "WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME YOU BIG OAF!!" 
 SMG4 mocked in a singy tone. "Elderly, elderly, eldery!"