BURIED

ONE

November 2022

B E L L E

My skin pale, my forearms covered in thick layers of bandages. My body too heavy for me to move, the waist broken, the joints rusty.

I can still feel the heat, the burnt metal burning into my bare skin. The air in my lungs still hot. I thought if I could think of it not to be a big deal, it could nullify the shock of dying.

Looking out the window, I came face to face with the dull grey sky. The clouds heavy. I loved the always gloomy weather, but not even that could lighten up my mood.

The continuous beeping noise of the machines in my hospital bedroom had become unbearable.

Not long ago, did I realize that I was not the only one that got panic attacks from hearing loud noises. So I'm normal, I guess?

The building was a block away from the main building, but the doctors and nurses that were in charge stayed. The room was all white with light shades of blue on the curtains and bedsheets, they had taken away almost everything we could use to hurt ourselves.

I'm not into that shit, but I've seen a girl during our weekly lunch dates that had these scars on her arms and face that still bled, and the bandages on her neck were stained with the seeping blood, and that didn't look like something you'll get from an explosion. I wondered what was going on in her head when she did that to herself.

"What time is it?" My friend, Jenna asked. She had been lying on my bed looking at the ceiling while she hummed along with the beeping machine.

"I don't know," I sighed walking back to the bed. "I need to sleep."

She turned to look at me not hiding the annoyance plastered on her face "I'll get going then," she jumped up, hugging me tightly and taking her bag with her. I could hear her footsteps while she walked down the stairs, the echoes of the quiet building exposing.

I waited for a while before I left for the garden. I haven't had an attack for a month now, so I'm getting discharged in a few days. What a relief

The garden behind the building looked more like a prison than an actual garden. It had little to no flowers. The only colorful thing there was the battered rose bush at the far end.

Most of the buildings in Preyton aren't exactly original. Nothing was original in the country anyway. My old high school used to be a military base. A fucking military base!

He was there, sitting on the same white chair. He always had a hat and coat on, so I've never seen his face, but he was always there. And I hoped I'd see him today and try to speak to him. He seemed normal, and I wondered what he was doing at this part of the hospital or who let him in.

"Gabin?" It was my nurse, she was a few feet from me and looked slightly startled when she noticed the man I was walking to. "Time to take off the bandages."

Bitch.

"I-I..."

"I know, you'll come out later," she said, her voice annoyingly enthusiastic. "Now let's go."

She dragged me back to the room immediately.

"Who was that?"

"No one important" she said quickly dismissing the conversation.

۵♡۵

January 2023 • 2 MONTHS LATER•

Present Day

"I'm advising you as a friend not as a doctor, you need to quit your job" Doctor Mikhail added pulling the Pulse Oximeter off my finger, my body temperature had risen and so did my pulse, I could feel my insides burning

"You're telling me this because you can't treat me, right?" I spoke, struggling to catch my breath.

"Both advice and treatment will do you good," Mikhail responded, fetching a glass of water from the nearby coffee table in his tastefully decorated consultation room.

"I can't quit the department, Mikhail," I argued, my resolve unwavering, I'd never quit the department, what else I'm I supposed to do with my life if i do.

"You don't understand Belle" he stated looking worried "You're a classic case of post traumatic stress, your vitals are being affected, your blood pressure has gone through the roof, if this is isn't treated urgently-"

"It'll give me a stroke" I stated ending his sentence "I know"

He poured some water into another glass cup and handed it to me. Took it eagerly, gulping down the liquid in one large swallow.

"I am not..." I began to protest but found myself struggling to breathe, I was suffocating. I couldn't even argue, it felt dreadful.

I stood up abruptly, signaling my intention to leave, and Mikhail knew me too well to acknowledge my tantrums.

Meanwhile, I believe my job is the only thing keeping me sane right now. Working behind a desk is detestable to me, and the thought of being confined to one every day was repulsive.

After that session with Doctor Mikhail, I took a taxi back to the department, I've been so eager to speak to Captain Omar in the hopes that he would reconsider and give me the case.

"No," he snapped in response.

"It's been four months, and we still don't have a proper main suspect. What kind of case is this?" I pressed, my frustration mounting.

"I don't care, Gabin. You're emotionally attached to this; you're not fit to handle it," Captain Omar maintained, tossing a file onto the table. "Take this, find her."

"Captain..." I began to protest, but he cut me off.

"Are you trying to argue?" Captain Omar's tone hardened.

"You're not getting the case," he reiterated sternly.

"Lieutenant," he addressed me again, his voice softer this time.

"Yes, Captain," I responded, adjusting my stance.

"I want you to lead this investigation," Captain Omar continued, his hands gesturing me to take the file on the table. "I'm doing this for you. It'll be best if you take your mind off it"

"But..." I started to object, but Captain Omar refused to entertain excuses, focusing his attention on his computer.
 

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✿ hey lovelies!, so what do you think about the first chapter? Thoughts?

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✿ Why are first chapters soo... draining!

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