little things - shinchan + kazama

curses aren't always scary

"oi! kazama-kun, have you seen shinnosuke?"  kaizawa asks kazama as he looks up from his book.

"huh? he was here until a while ago but i don't really know where he might be right now"

that majes the guy looking for shinnosuke drop his shoulders but atleast he gives a bright smile to kazama as he thanked him and then ran off to somewhere else. kazama turns to his right to ask masao if he knows something about this— ack!

i almost screamed

ai-chan's standing right there as if she might step on kazama's head any second. that was a total jumpscare.

"have you really not, though? kazama-san" she asks in her polite voice which does irk kazama a little but he ignores it off like always.

"yes. why would i lie?" he says back, a bit of annoyance reflecting in his voice. why did it feel like she was accusing him of lying about something so stupid?

"nothing much, i just wondered how you aren't aware of your own best friend's whereabouts when you're always sticking to him like an annoying gum that is hard to get off our shoes while talking a stroll at the park"

she gives him a sweet smile as he hands are still at the back like they always are, and now she's going for the seat in front of kazama as she sits there, her hand in front so she rests her chin there.

kazama calmly closes his book as he looks straight in her eyes. he knows she's had a crush on shinnosuke for over a decade now but what does that have to do with her getting annoyed by kazama?

what did he ever do? more so, why is so passive aggressive about this? kazama doesn't understand.

"hahaha, what do you mean by an annoying gum, ai-chan? that's not a very nice example, but anyways. i don't think it's a big deal if i don't know why my best friend is at a particular moment. we're all still in school and it's nothing to overreact about. but if it hurt you in some way, you do have my sympathy"

he can see ai's left brow twitch at that which by the way makes kazama so satisfied he internally smirked. that's right, you should be annoyed.

"ah~ is that so? then, I'm very thankful for your sympathy. with that I'd like to ask the great kazama-san to please keep his distance with shinnosuke-chan to help me feel less miserable. since you are very aware of my decent feelings towards him, right?"

she gives him yet another smile and this time it really feels like she's calling for an open war with that. kazama is not going to sit back though.

"and what does that have to do with me? I'm his very best friend, not a cupid if you're misunderstood there. you should be taking responsibility for your own felings instead of pushing them onto the person you like. you're no one to tell me to stay away from him, and i won't be listening"

"aha~? i didn't know kazama-san was this rude. though, i could ask you the same thing. who are you to tell me not to push my feelings on the person i admire? you wouldn't know if he actually enjoyed my way of pursuing him, could you? since you said it yourself that you are no cupid"

what?

kazama blinks cluelessly at that as a few seconds and hundreds of thoughts pass through his mind. he knew she was being outright obnoxious but why did it have such an inpact on him? why do those words sting like a whole sword directed straight towards his heart?

"wh-who am i? I'm his friend so of course i know him better than yo—"

"haha, i guess you got my point by that reaction. well then, I'll be taking my leave. take care of yourself though, kazama-san. self doubt is a solemn disease"

and she gets up before kazama can either collect or speak out his thoughts. which us, if he had any in the first place.

why? why though? why didn't i say something confidently like i had been this whole time?!

and a realisation hit him like the ball that comes at you as a succesfull homeroom is about to take place. kazama staresat the empty seat in front of him.

it was an embarrassing realisation. he had been talking just fine when he had a cover for himself to hide away in while still shooting his spells but as soon as he's asked to change that cover he froze up and lost.

the cover of friendship. the excuse of being shinnosuke's best friend that let him be confident about his feelings because he was so sure no one would catch up onto that. it was something he could always use whenever he was confronted by anyone or anything.

but if you took that away from him he's just a stray cat wandering away on a rainy day. he didn't have the courage to put a name to his excuse. if someone told me he's just his friend there was nothing else he could say.

he still doubts his own vulnerable feelings yet he was supposed to even let the best friend tag. it felt like ai saw right through him and mocked him for his stupidity.

as if she was bragging about her freedom of accepting her feelings and being sincere to them in front of the whole world while kazama trues to cover himself with every inch of his worn out cover. and she peeked right through one of the holes.

kazama looks at his own palms as his his mind is playing those words again and again. who am i? really, who am i to get annoyed at her? who am i to not like that she has feelings for shinnosuke? who am i to ask her who she is?

even though he knows ai wouldn't know of his feelings and was just trying to mock him, it still got the best of him. in the end, kazama is nothing but a great fool.

+×+

yo! How's everyone? here's the new chapter but surprise it's nothing but angst lol