She Fits The Shoe

Come To Jesus Meeting

*Continuation Of Last Chapter*

Toni: We have to talk.

I didn't move my head but Toni's words peaked my interest.

Me: About what?

Toni walked up and sat in front of me on the bed.

Toni: Jack I miss you.

Me: I haven't gone anywhere?

Toni: Maybe not physically...

I finally took my head off the wall.

Me: What do you mean?

Toni: You may have not gone anywhere physically but I can tell you're not here mentally anymore. You don't smile anymore and I miss you're smile. I miss the butterflies you're smile used to give me.

Me: I still smile Koala.

Toni: No you don't. Jack you may smirk or put on a fake smile for others but I know the difference. Do you want to know what else I miss? Your eyes, I really miss looking in those beautiful blue eyes and especially that feeling I would get when I looked in them. No matter how sad I was, when I looked into your eyes I'd know that everything would be okay. I miss when you would know I was sad and you'd start acting goofy just to make me feel better or when we couldn't be together then you'd text me paragraphs out of no where about how beautiful you think I am. Then you'd FaceTime me all day and joke around and just be my little goofball for no other reason then you loved me.

Her words hit me like a ton of bricks. I didn't care who I hurt but I never ever want to hurt Toni. She's my best friend and to know that I did the one thing I never wanted to do killed me. I felt my heart finally complete break. I couldn't stop the tears as they streamed down my face fast and I finally took my sunglasses off. I finally moved from my position and reached out, grabbing Toni and pulling her in to a huge hug. I held her tightly as the tears continued to flow. Toni returned the hug as one of her hands went up in to the hair on the back of my head.

Toni(softly): It's okay Jack. Let it all out, it's okay.

Me(sniffles): I-I'm so sorry Koala...

Toni: It's okay Teddy. We're fine, just let it all out.

Me(sniffles): It just hurts so bad...

Toni just held me as I clung to her, drenching her chest in tears. As Toni ran her fingers through my hair, she would lean her head down and press her lips to the top of my head. We just sat there as I finally showed some emotion for the first time since I got the news that Jay was gone. I finally pulled back and looked into Toni's beautiful eyes.

Me: I'm so sorry you had to see me like this and I'm especially sorry I hurt you.

Toni: Jack you don't have to apologize. I told you we're fine and we are. It's okay to show emotion and to cry. You're still my big strong Teddy Bear and I don't think less of you at all. I'm still your best friend, I'm still your Koala. Just promise me one thing, okay?

Me: Anything for you.

Toni couldn't help her smile and blush at me saying I'd do anything for her. She should know by now that I'd do anything for her.

Toni: Just don't shut me out anymore, okay? If you're having issues come to me or one of the girls or Mox or Darby or just anyone. You don't have to do this alone. If you want, I'll gladly fight this right by your side. Just promise me you'll come to me or someone if you're hurting. I never ever want to see you like this again? Please? For me? For YOUR Toni? For YOUR Koala?

Me: I promise Koala.

Toni and I smiled at each other. I couldn't help my smile. To hear Toni's words and know there genuine meant everything to me. I couldn't help it after seeing Toni's beautiful smiling face. Toni closed the distance between us before kissing my forehead.

Toni: I love you.

Me: I love you more. You're really my little ride or die aren't you?

Toni smiled before leaning in and kissing my cheek. When she kissed my cheek, it was dangerously close to my lips which caused me to blush a little.

Toni: Always have been and always will be.

I smiled again and Toni finally brought it up.

Toni: It finally feels like everything is going to be okay again. There's my best friend's smile.

I leaned in and kissed her cheek.

Me: All because of the cutest, most beautiful little Koala ever.

My words caused Toni to blush once again, only this time she blushed a deeper shade of red as a sweet smile came across her lips.

Toni: Even when you're hurting, you still want to make me feel special.

Me: Well yeah. That's what you do when you love someone ain't it?

Toni: You're the best.

Me: Well I get it from you since I'm around you all the time.

I nudged her shoulder with my own, causing her to let out a little laugh.

Toni: Hey are you getting tired?

Me: I'm exhausted. What about you Koala?

Toni: I am too.

Me: Well can we maybe...possibly have a Sleepover in here and maayyybbeee...cuddle?

Toni smiled at me acting shy and nervous.

Toni: Of course we can. I'll always want a cuddle with my Teddy.

I threw my hoodie off before we got in bed beside each other. Toni then softly patted her chest before I rolled over and laid on top of her with my head resting on top of Toni's chest. I wrapped my arms around her and she returned my action by wrapping her arms around me before her hand once again found it's way into the hair on the back of my head. She began to once again scratch the back of my head. She then leaned down and pressed her lips to the top of my head causing me to melt in to her.

Toni: Goodnight Jack I love you so much.

Me: Goodnight Koala, I love you too and thank you.

I gave her chest a few soft, gentle kisses before she gave the top of my head one last time, causing me to completely melt in to her. I soon fell asleep and I felt a million times lighter. All because of Toni, she might be my way out. If she's not my complete way out then she's definitely the key to it. I know she's gonna be in my passenger seat through all of this and there isn't anyone else I'd want to ride through this with.