A New Life - Supernatural Fanfic

Chapter 32 - The boys take Amelia

I cried I cried and I cried. Huge lumps of tears rolled down my cheeks. It was like a never-ending waterfall.

It had been a day since I heard the news. I remember hearing Crowley's voice on the phone, running towards the doorway and listening in. Only to find out that he had killed Shannon. My best friend was gone. I remember feeling sick to the stomach and lightheaded, just before everything went black.

I had awoken in my bed, Sam cosied next to me. The rest of the boys sitting around my bed. I will forever recall the way their faces looked when I came to. The stress of the past few months, having Amelia and then this has caught up with my body, causing me to faint.

Sam lay next to me, brushing my hair. I lay, motionless and not blinking, looking up at the ceiling. I couldn't even begin to comprehend it. How was she only just here - a beating heart and smiling face - a little over a day ago, and now she was just gone. My breaths felt flat. I would never walk into the saloon anymore to be greeted by her. Never hear her humorously loud voice again or her contagious laugh. It was like all the happiness had been sucked out of the world. Even Sam's touch didn't make my body jump for joy. I had to be strong though. I just had a baby. I couldn't just give up.

The thought ran around my brain and I turned into Sam's shoulder, closing my eyes. A few stray drops escaped them. They stung from the amount of lost tears. My body shook. I could feel Sammy's arms around me, rubbing my back in an attempt to soothe me.

"It's okay darling, shh shh." He spoke with a softness like the stuffing inside a teddy bear.

"How is it okay Sammy? How?" I muffled a response. He continued holding me close.

"Maybe it isn't okay right now. But one day it'll be better. The pain will consume you less. It most likely will hurt every time you think about her, but the loss and grief won't be consistent forever."

I sniffed, my heart piercing again.

"Oh God Sammy, why. Why her" I sobbed. I could feel Sam trying to keep it together. He said nothing, for neither of us had a good answer to that. We lay silently instead, tangled in one another.

I heard the door creak open a little while later. Twisting my head up, I saw Cas standing in the doorway.

"Hi Cas" I croaked out. I could feel my eyes watering again. When would this constant crying stop?

He said nothing, walking over to the bed, his trench coat sweeping behind him. Leaning down, he embraced me in a warm hug. I wrapped my arms around him, pressing my cheek against his chest.

"How are you hey?"

I said nothing. Cas pulled away, rubbing my arm.

"I just wanted to let you know that Amelia is okay. She's been with us. We can look after her for a few days if you want?" His voice sounded gentle to my ears. I nodded.

"That would be nice. Thank you." I attempted a small smile. He placed two fingers on my forehead, a sensation going through. It calmed me.

"I hope that helps." He smiled at me and Sam before walking out. Sam looked at me inquisitively.

"He did something to relax me. It worked." I fell back into his arms and we snuggled down under the covers together.

"I love you Jess Jess." He placed a kiss on my temple.

"I love you too." I whispered back.

Cas' POV

I walked into the living room where Dean leant over Amelia. He was tickling her tummy. She made small gurgling noises. I stopped, watching, and smiled.