BROKEN COURAGE (Broken Redemption Book 3)

Chapter 4

Lucas

"Better?" I ask a few minutes later, seizing the opportunity to gaze down at her. Even weighed down by stress and exhaustion, she's still the most beautiful woman I've ever known.

"Much, thank you. I can't tell you how badly I needed this."

"That has to change, sweetheart. You have to tell me when you're overwhelmed. Even if you're uncomfortable sharing the details, I need to know you'll at least tell me enough so I can be there for you."

When her eyes drift back up to the sky and she doesn't respond, my frustration gets the better of me. "If this thing between us is going to work, you need to talk to me, Embree. You don't have to tell me everything that's in your head, but I can't handle another day like today. I can endure a great many things, especially if it means I get to keep you, but lies and deceit... that I'm not sure we can survive."

A quiet gasp slips past her lips before she whispers, "You're right. I'm so sorry, Lucas." The way her chin quivers leaves me desperate to comfort her, but the empty apology stops me in my tracks. She uttered those same words to me yesterday as we addressed this very same topic, and still, she lied to me again.

"I don't need an apology, Embree. What I need is the truth. I don't expect you to tell me your secrets before you're ready, but I do expect that when something is wrong, you'll be honest about it. You lied to me again today, and if that wasn't bad enough, you had Hannah corroborate the lie. Do you have any idea what that feels like? To know that the woman I love more than life itself is in trouble, but she refuses to tell me what's going on, let alone allow me to help her. It makes me feel worthless. It makes me feel like you don't trust me to take care of you."

"That's not it, Lucas. I do trust you. I swear to God, I do," she insists.

"Then why the lies? After your exam today, why pretend everything's okay when it's so obviously not?"

"I don't want to hurt you..." her words spill out in a rush of frustration, but then her eyes grow wide like she wishes she hadn't said them.

"Embree..." I force myself to pause, taking a breath to rein in the mix of conflicting emotions that have me teetering on the edge. The last thing I want is to say something I'll later regret. "Nothing hurts me more than when you lie to me. You forget I know you, that I can tell when you're being evasive and untruthful. What happened today, the way you and Hannah both lied straight to my face, you hurt me, Embree. And I don't say that to make you feel bad or to manipulate you into telling me your secrets. I'm telling you that because for me, lies in a relationship are a hard limit."

When she stares up at me with a look of devastation shimmering in her eyes, that familiar ache inside my chest flares to life. Her reaction speaks to her mistrust. Whether her hesitation is about her trust in me or our relationship, I don't know. Either way, it doesn't bode well for the future I have planned for us.

The thing is, I've already lost this woman two times in my life. The first time, I was a grief-stricken 17-year-old kid with no options. The second time I lost her was to a trick of the mind, a game I played to help me survive the unsurvivable. There too, I had no chance to fight for her, but this time... this time I absolutely do. And it starts right here, right now.

"Just tell me this, Emb. Do you want to be with me? When you close your eyes and imagine your future, am I the man standing at your side?"

With tears in her eyes, her answer is instant, "Yes. More than anything. All I've ever wanted is to be with you."

"Then, for now, I'll accept that as enough." I lean down and take her lips in a tender kiss that's as much to ease the turmoil in my head as it is to prove to her I mean it. "As long as you see a future with me, I won't push. I'll be patient and wait until you're ready, but make no mistake, I'm not giving up. I intend to fight for you. For us. For now, I'll give you time to figure things out on your own, but I need you to promise me that in the meantime you won't shut me out, that no matter what, you'll let me be there for you."