The Lavender Butterfly

Chapter 25

“I can’t bear to tell them the news,” I repeated over and over in my head. I was restlessly pacing back and forth outside the ballroom. I knew that I was told not to break the news to them, but it was very hard to stay in the same room with them knowing what I knew. I knew that Chris was never coming back from the beginning, and now others are going to find out what I already knew. It had been almost two hours. I poked my head into the ballroom door and observed Chloe sitting down at the table, apparently finally tired after all of her dancing, and Evan playing a game on his phone. I didn’t know how long they were going to last. I didn’t know how long I was going to last. I walked back into the ballroom up to the table. “Do you guys just want to go back up to your room?” I spoke. “Yes,” said Evan and Chloe, in unison with a strong sense of boredom. “Do you have a key, Evan?” I said. He flipped out his card key and said “I’ll text my mom and let her know we’ll be up in the room.” We walked back up to the room. Evan swiped the keycard on their hotel room door, followed by a faint beep and a mechanical click. Chloe instantly jumped on the bed. Evan turned the TV on and put some cartoons on for Chloe to keep her busy. The expression was moot, as she was out cold within five minutes. “She’s sleeping,” I said to Evan. Evan nodded. “I’m surprised she made it as long as she did. She was dancing out there for quite awhile.” He looked at the alarm clock on the nightstand. “Mom and Meredith have been gone for a while.” He sighed, then looked over at me. “Do you think everything is okay?” he said to me. I shrugged my shoulders. “No clue,” I replied. “They looked pretty upset when they left. They were gone before I even had any idea why they were leaving.” Even looked at the floor with a somber look on his face. “I think I know what this is about,” Evan said, eyes still fixed on the floor. I said nothing, but I gave him a side hug and rested my head on his shoulder. He wrapped his arms around me. I’m not sure if it was just me comforting him or him comforting me. Either way, I think we both needed to be comforted. Moments later, the hotel door opened. Evan and I abruptly let each other go and scooted about three feet apart from each other. Meredith and Stella walked through the door, both wiping their faces off with tissues. Chloe sat up in bed, wiping her eyes. Even stood up and walked over to Stella, placing his hands on her shoulders. “What’s wrong, mom? Is everything okay?” he said. Stella stood with her mouth open for a few moments, then spoke. “Both of you sit down. I have something to tell you,” she said. “It’s about Chris, isn’t it?” Evan said, his eyes starting to glisten. Meredith burst out crying. I ran over to comfort her. Chloe looked perplexed but had a look of worry on her face. Stella took a hold of both of her kids and gave them both a warm, comforting hug. “It’s Chris…..he’s gone…..” Stella said, sniffling. “Wait,” is Chris……dead?” Chloe said, tears slowly streaming out of her eyes. Stella gloomily nodded yes. Chloe burst into tears and instantly latched onto her mother. I couldn’t bear to see her cry, I started to cry, myself. Evan himself looked like he was going to explode. His face began to turn red, before he stormed out into the hall. “Evan,” Stella said as he stormed out, but he was already out of the room. “I’ll go talk to him,” I said, as I followed him out to the hallway. He stood out in the hall, motionless, looking away from me. “Evan…” I said, as I put my hand on his shoulder. He took my hand and removed it from his shoulder. “Don’t touch me right now, just…..leave me alone,” he said to me, making every attempt not to look at me. I sighed and started to walk back to the room. I turned back to him. “If you ever need to talk, I’ll be here for you, Evan,” I said to him. “That’s what he would have said to me,” he said, still facing away from me. I shuddered. I was stunned, but I didn’t have much time to react because Evan turned around and launched himself into my arms, completely breaking down into tears. “He was like a father to me,” he said, crying into my shoulder. “and another father figure in my life that has gone away from me,” he continued. “What am I supposed to do now? he said somberly. I hugged him warmly, running my hand through his hair. “Evan, you still have a lot of people that love you dearly. Your mother of course, your little sister loves you very much. She really looks up to you. And Meredith loves all of you guys. And plus, you have me, right?” Evan looked in my eyes and gave the smallest hint of a smile, and then buried his face in my shoulder again. “Thank you, Olivia,” he whispered to me. Meredith walked out to the hall and slowly inched her way over to us, as she wrapped her arms around us both. I heard Chloe wailing through the closed hotel door. “Come on, let’s go back into the room,” Meredith said. The three of us slowly shuffled back into the hotel room. Seeing Chloe cry was too much for me to bear. I walked over to Chloe, got on my knees and gave her a big hug, while rubbing her back gently. “I miss him already,” she whimpered. “I really wish I could have met him,” I replied. Even turned toward the group. “What are we going to do, now?” he said. “Where is Chris? Did they find him?” he continued. Meredith replied, “The coast guard is attempting a search and rescue operation. They are done searching tonight because it’s too dark now, but they are going to start the search again tomorrow morning.” Evan looked back at her with a glimpse of hope. “So he could still be alive, right?” Meredith gave him a somber look, and then reached into her purse. She pulled out Chris’s wallet and phone, both saturated with ocean water. Evan’s hopeful expression quickly turned somber again. “The authorities are going to continue the search tomorrow, but it’s not likely he survived. I’m sorry, Evan,” Meredith said, as she hugged him. Stella turned to Evan and Chloe and said, “Let’s try and get some sleep. I know it’s going to be hard to sleep, but we have to get up early for our flight home.” “Flight home?!” Evan shouted. “I’m not going anywhere until they f—” “Evan, Evan, Evan,” Meredith interrupted. Don’t worry. Olivia and I will be staying down here until they are done with the search. We’ll be back up there soon enough.” Evan, still heated, shouted to Meredith, “You know what?! You seem awfully calm for someone who just lost her husb—” Stella intervened, “Evan, that is ENOUGH! She has been through absolute hell tonight! The last thing she needs is be screamed at by you!” The room was filled with deafening silence. The only sound was the echo of Stella’s screaming in the walls. Even looked at Meredith. “I’m sorry, Meredith. I’m not angry with you, I’m just…..really upset right now,” he said sheepishly. Meredith, with tears in her eyes, replied, “It’s okay Evan. We all are. Olivia and I will take care of things down here. There’s not much else we can do. Just…. everybody try to get some sleep tonight, okay?” Meredith wrapped her arm around me and motioned me to go. “Let’s get back to our room,” she said. “Goodnight, everyone,” Meredith said, she and I walking to the door. Evan walked toward me, “Hey, Olivia,” he said to me. I turned to him. “Goodnight,” he continued. “Goodnight, Evan,” I replied. As Meredith and I walked back to our room, she had a puzzled look on her face. “What was that all about?” she said. “I don’t know, he’s just being nice, I guess?” I replied. Meredith gave me an amused look as she opened the door to our hotel room. “He totally has a crush on you, Olivia. Anyone can see it!” she said. “Oh, I’m pretty sure he has more than just a crush on me,” I replied. Meredith laughed. “Olivia, you are very pretty, you are going to break a lot of boys’ hearts, that’s for sure,” she said, chuckling. Meredith then continued, somehow forgetting that I used to be her husband, “Uh, I’m sorry, we were married, and you were a man and…. you were into women, and you were into…. well, me,” she rambled. “So…. I’m kind of curious now. Who are you into now, girls or boys? I…. I mean, I won’t judge. You know what kind of person I am, I’m open-min—” I interrupted her mid-sentence, “Slow down, slow down, slow down…. I’m not really sure who I’m into now…. boys or girls…..It’s just, I wasn’t into guys before, but something has changed in me since I became a girl. I don’t know really.” There was a long pause. “You totally like him, don’t you?” Meredith said with a smirk on her face. “What?! No! I mean, I know he likes me, but…” I replied. Meredith laughed, as she chanted childishly, “Evan and Olivia, sittin’ in a tree, K-I-S-S-I—” “MOM! You’re embarrassing me!” I shouted. At that moment, I felt that time completely stood still. This moment felt like an eternity. Her mouth hung open. I desperately wanted the silence to end. “Mom?” she replied. “No, no, no, I meant Meredith,” I said, frantically trying to cover up my tracks. Once again, there was a long pause. She started to tear up. “You’re right…. I am your mom,” she said, tears rolling down her cheek. “I…. guess you’re right,” I replied, starting to tear up myself. She squeezed me warmly. “I love you, Olivia,” she said, trying to hold back the tears. “I love you too……Mom,” I replied. The two of us were crying tears of joy. I’m not going to lie, I was partially happy that this took the focus off what was going on between Evan and I, but I was perfectly fine calling Meredith my mother. I somehow loved her even more than I did before. “Anyway, we should probably get some sleep, we’ve got some acting to do tomorrow, you know, to try and convince people we are grieving, right?” I spoke. “Acting? Sure, I have been acting it up a little, but I still am grieving the loss of my husband. I am milking it a little, but I still miss my husband,” she replied. “But….” she continued, “With you in my life, I suppose I have everything I need to help me move on,” she said as we both smiled at each other.