Stories of Aadshend (object OCs)

The Diary

TW, self harm, suicide attempt mention

[Note: this story is about a comic I made a while back. If you'd like to read the comic, you could find a link to it at the end of this!!]
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It was dark outside, and Timey and Metal Straw were watching TV. Metal Straw was bleeding under a bandage.

"You know," Timey started, "if you don't want to talk about how you feel, you could always write it down.."

Metal Straw glanced at the clock. "Hm? What do you mean?"

The clock sighed. "Well, like. You could start a journal or something, yeah? And.. instead of 'releasing emotions' the way you are now.. you could, like, write them down?"

Metal Straw sighed. "No.. I don't want to."

"Why not? A lot of people say keeping a journal or diary helps!!" Timey said with an encouraging smile.

Metal Straw and Timey's eyes met for a moment. He knew Timey was trying to be helpful. She realized she'd apparently never told beep why she didn't enjoy the idea of keeping a journal.

"I.. I know I just.. don't want to.."

Timey sighs sadly. "Maybe a coloring book then.. I dunno.. I just.. I love you and if we can, an alternative would be nice.."

Metal Straw also sighs.

The two silently watched the television.

At some point Metal Straw spoke up again.

"You know how I caught the building I lived in on fire? Because I got mad? And got put in jail?"

Timey nodded. "Yeah.. it's a bit hard for me to imagine you doing that.. but I guess you have? You just aren't really that violent of an object."

Metal Straw stared at the floor thoughtfully. "Well.. I stretched the truth a little.. And, I guess the actual story just isn't that cool, haha.. I don't know if.. if I should tell you.."

Timey was quiet. Metal Straw was always a bit secretive. A lot of his emotions seemed to appear out of nowhere. It was very hard to read, but Timey always had a feeling things were left out of the story. Metal Straw always told it as if they were some rebellious and extreme criminal, but personality-wise, Metal Straw was actually quite timid, and sometimes even a bit squeamish.

Timey was struggling to figure out how to respond, but thankfully Metal Straw seemed to continue.

"If I tell you... you promise not to, like, get too upset?"

Timey was nervously uncertain where this was headed, but gently put their hand on Metal Straw's, nodding with a reassuring smile.

Metal Straw sighed again, hesitant to speak.

"So, I did burn it down, but.. I wasn't really trying to hurt people? I guess I was aware of the possibility.. but I figured they'd be able to get out before it got too bad..? I don't know. I wasn't thinking straight.. but I wasn't only angry.. I was also sad."

"You burned down the building because you were sad?"

"Eh.. I guess? I wasn't.. I wasn't really focused on the building. I was more just.. curious if it'd kill me. I was hoping to let it melt me into a liquid. I probably could've died if I wasn't made of metal.."

Timey felt a dropping sensation inside of them. "You.. You were trying to die?"

Metal Straw was quiet, and seemed to have a blank, empty expression, but eventually nodded solemnly.

Timey opened beeps arms slightly, offering a hug, which Metal Straw sort of just leaned into. He didn't cry.

"I'm really glad you're here MS," Timey told him, "I don't know where I'd be if.."

Timey cut beepself off, not wanting to continue.

Eventually Metal Straw pulled away, staring at nothing again, in thought.. "Anyways.. but.. the reason I was upset, uhm.. I actually did have a diary at some point, and I knew they could, like, help with emotion stuff.."

Timey sat up curiously, not really expecting to circle back to the journaling conversation, as Metal Straw continued.

"I would write everything in that thing.. I was figuring out my identity, and that's where I put my thoughts on it. I'd write about my health and.. symptoms.. I'd write- I'd write about everything that upset me.. my friends.. not having a family.. whatever came to mind, that's where I put it. And it was mine, and I never.. I never thought anybody would see it.."

Metal Straw's voice got quieter in that last sentence, as they frowned a bit, beginning to feel a little uneasy, holding onto her arms for some sort of grounding.

Timey began to realize why Metal Straw was so hesitant to journal. The straw who seemed entirely empty only moments before, now looked profoundly upset.

"One of the others there found it, read it, and shared it with everybody.. They were mad at me.. they made fun of me.. they began ignoring me.. I didn't think they'd read it.. I wouldn't have written anything in there if I knew they would.."

Tears formed in Metal Straw's eyes as she felt overwhelmed with emotions similar to the ones she felt that day. The straw didn't cry very often.. Timey left and came back with a tissue box, not really sure how to comfort their lover, but wanting to, so badly.

Metal Straw put its arms on its knees, covering their face with them.

"It was so embarrassing, and I felt so mean for what I wrote.. I thought I must've been really mean and bad for writing those things.."

Metal Straw became quiet again, crying into their arms.

"You weren't," Timey told him softly. "The.. the whole point of a diary is that you could write whatever you want in there.. and nobody is supposed to read it!! What they did was.. a really big invasion of privacy.. and if anybody there was mean, I promise it wasn't you."

Metal Straw sniffled, but eventually nodded.

"C-can we hug again?" she asked.

It wasn't very common that Metal Straw was the one asking for hugs. Usually he didn't like being touched at all, but when he needed one, there was nobody they'd rather have one from.

Timey wrapped beeps arms around him, letting the straw cry as she clung onto the clock.

Eventually Metal Straw felt calmer, slowly letting go of Timey, and letting out a sigh.

"Sorry if that was weird.."

"It wasn't, I promise," Timey said, grabbing a tissue and gently wiping underneath one of the straw's eyes.

Metal Straw felt a little embarrassed about losing her composure, but also felt a bit of relief. Almost like a weight had been lifted off of them. And she felt loved. And a little sleepy.

The two continued watching TV, Metal Straw laying on Timey's lap like a pillow, beginning to doze off.

Timey had an arm around them, and also started to fall asleep themself.

[link to comic: https://theaadshendarchives.blogspot.com/2023/04/metal-straws-diary-may-june-2022.html ]