Atramentous: A Solangelo AU

It Was Supposed To Hurt

"D-Dad?" I stuttered, gripping the doorknob tight enough that my fingers turned paper white.

Hades was dressed as usual, in a suit and tie with his hair slicked back and carefully styled in a way that was popular in Italy. He had a strong, square jawline, black eyes, and a worry-worn face that had been tanned at one time but was now pale from spending all of his time at an office desk or at business meetings. That was the only similarity between us that I could see, our complexion. Like all of the color had been drained out of us along with our happiness.

He smiled grimly, nodding, "Nico."

I hadn't seen him in six months and that's all he had to say to me? I guessed he was probably thinking the same thing.

"You're home early." I swallowed, forcing myself to relax my grip on the nob and shut the door. I felt like I was trapping myself, cutting off my last chance to run back to Will's.

Don't get me wrong, I love my dad, but he just hasn't been the same since the fire. There was a brief period of time after he met Marie and they got married when he was happy again, back to his old self, but now he was more reserved, his temper was short, and I hardly ever saw him. Maybe it was stress from work, maybe he just wanted his wife and daughter back. I wouldn't blame him for wishing it had been me instead of Bianca.

He nodded again, attempting what was probably supposed to be a warm smile. He looked like a wilting flower, still fighting for life and grace despite the fact that it was slowly dying. "I wanted to surprise you."

Well, you definitely achieved your goal, then. I grinned back, I hoped my fake smiles were more convincing than his. If they weren't, then the light never touched my eyes, I'd never considered the possibility before, that my eyes always looked sad even when I was smiling. "It's good to see you."

Hades stood up and crossed the room, he towered over me just like everyone else. I started slightly when he stooped down to envelope me in a hug. I stood there in shock for a couple of moments before I returned the embrace. My father's arms were strong and reassuring, I wondered what his face looked like, if I could detect false emotion in it right then.

"I missed you," he told me, he sounded truthful, at least.

"You never call." The words spilled out of my mouth before I could stop them. Hades released me and straightened, and I instantly regretted them, looking at the ground.

He sighed, a desolate sound that echoed my regret. "I know."

I looked up to meet his troubled gaze, I'd recognize that face anywhere, it was the same expression that had stared me down in the mirror so many times in the past. The one that said I was bottling up my emotions and I shouldn't be. The one that said I had finally hit rock bottom again and I needed to scramble my way out of the hole I'd dug myself into. I never reached the surface.

"I'm sorry, I haven't been the greatest father to you." He laughed hollowly. "I've hardly been your father at all." His accent was still thick, but his English was good. He hardly ever made mistakes when he spoke, and when he did, they weren't life-changing.

I opened my mouth to protest, but Hades held a hand up, "You and I both know it's true, but I'm here to try and make it up to you."

I stared at him in shock. No matter how many times I'd wished this would happen, I'd never thought it actually would. "What about your work?"

"I took three weeks off." My eyes widened, my dad hadn't been home for more than a week before. Hades didn't seem to notice. "I tried to get a full month, but Mr. Zoose said that three weeks was pushing it and I need that job to pay the bills." He sighed regretfully.