His Kitten, Amnesiac (A Black Butler X Reader Fanfic)

His Kitten, Comforted

Emotions were swirling around in your chest as you run down the hallway, ignoring Sebastian calling after you. You weren't sure if he was chasing you as well, but you didn't care. You just wanted to get away from him. Your head hurt, and you've never felt more confused before. You just wanted answers, but it felt as if you couldn't trust anything and that just made you more confused. You scurry through the halls, heading towards the room that you had been staying in since your arrival. Maybe time to yourself would help you sort out the multiple flashbacks that had been barraging you recently.

Down the hall, Sebastian hurries after you, managing to keep his cool composure despite his concern. Little did you know, he genuinely did not know what you were talking about, and your explosive reaction worried him. He knew it must have been extremely hard for you to not have any memories and still have to cope with reality. The process of gaining them back was not helping to make you feel any better, he knew that, and it hurt him that you assumed he'd conspire against you. Far from that, he was hurt with the way you looked at him before running away. You looked so betrayed, so distressed, like poor little kitten with a hurt foot. He hated that look on your face, and he was going to do whatever he could to make you feel better.

Eventually he reaches the end of a hallway, the dead end being a door that led directly to your room. He can hear you inside, and he lightly raps on the door with his knuckles. "(Name)?"

From inside the room, from your position perched on the bed's edge, you sniffle and rub your eyes. The frustration was making you cry, and you felt irritated about the vulnerability. You didn't cry, crying is for the weak. You're not weak, you can't be weak.

"(Name), I would like to apologize, but I prefer to do it face to face. May I please come in?" You hear Sebastian's polite tone tinged with what sounded like worry and turn your head towards the door.

"Why should I? You're hiding something from me, Sebastian, I just know you are!" You snap at the butler, who sighs in return.

"Alright, I'm coming in." He opens the door and steps inside, lightly frowning at your shaky figure. "My dear, you must trust me for a moment while I tell you this," He begins, crossing the room to stand next to you. To your mild surprise, he kneels down and takes your hands. "(Name)," He brushes some stray hairs from your face, wiping away some of the tears with his gloved thumb.

You attempt to glare at him through your tears, but the gentle touch was helping to break your tough facade down and you could feel your resolve crumbling. "Sebastian," You mumble, feeling his thumb rub your cheek affectionately. "I-I..."

"Shh, I know, (Name)." He shushes you and moves to sit next to you on the bed, pulling you into an embrace. "I know you are feeling upset, my dear. It must be very frustrating for you to deal with all of these emotions." He smoothes your hair from your face and you feel your resolving completely break down, a wave of fresh tears pouring down your face. You bury your face in his shoulder and cry, giving up on trying to be tough.

Helplessness was not something you were handling well. You felt so frustrated by the lack of answers to your questions, and the fact that no one else had the answers either was only making you feel worse. The confusion of waking up with nothing in your mind was a scary thing, more frightening then Ciel or Alois or even Sebastian realized. Most of the time when someone asked themselves, "Who am I?", they would always know the answers whether they realized it or not. But when you can't answer those three words, that one question that every child can answer, it's the most frightening feeling the soul can feel. And that's exactly what you were.

Scared. Frightened. Frustrated. Confused. Worried.

And it all just bubbled up inside until you couldn't take it anymore, the expression of the emotions being tears. Sebastian may not have realized it, but he was helping you greatly by just being there with you. At least you could count on him being there, unlike your memories.

As you sob into his chest, Sebastian pets your hair and rubs your back, murmuring comforting words to help calm you down. He knew nothing he would say would really help you feel better, so he would just have to be there for you to cry on. The minutes flow by, and eventually you manage to stop crying. Even so, you remain in his embrace, your steady breathing leading him to believe you've fallen asleep.

He lightly pets the fluffy ears atop your head and speaks quietly. "My poor kitten, it's quite upsetting to hear your tears." He says. "Though I will admit, seeing you so helpless is a nice change of pace from your usual feisty demeanor,"

'What kind of weird stuff are you saying, Bassy?'  You think, saying nothing to see if he'd keep talking. To your delight, he does.

"You're rather fascinating, you know. The way you appear and yet the manor still gets attached to you so quickly. You've managed to get everyone under your spell my little vixen." The butler shifts slightly before turning and laying you down on the mattress. He removes your shoes and places them on the floor, pulling the quilt off of the bed and covering you with it. You keep your eyes shut and pretend to be asleep, shifting a bit as he moves the quilt. He chuckles and smooths your (h/c) hair back, shushing you softly. Then, you nearly jump in surprise as leans down, pressing his lips against you forehead in a gentle manner.

Almost as if he senses your surprise, he chuckles, but remains silent. He merely sits up and resumes stroking your hair. Eventually, the peaceful silence, the rhythmic petting, and the soft humming Sebastian started who knows how long ago, gently ushers you to a soft sleep.

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I am so sorry. Please forgive me for this trash of a chapter. It's short, it's filler, I swear I will try to get the next chapter out much faster. I started a new OHSHC reader insert, which I have a lot of fresh ideas for, but I'll still be updating this. I've got major exams this week for school, which is most likely why I suddenly have all the magical writing ideas in the world. I tried to tap into the philosophy of the amnesiac reader and how it would affect someone in real life realistically while working in some more sweet time with Bassy. I hope you enjoy it, despite the trash that it is.