Tumblr's Guide to the Emo Trinity

My Life

Dad: Hey, don't forget to close the door on your way out.

Me: Now imagine -

Dad: Oh god.

Me: As I'm pacing the pews in a church corridor -

Dad: Please. Stop. Now.

Me: And I can't help but to hear -

Dad: It's the third time this week!

Me: No I can't he,o but to hear an exchanging of words -

Dad: Stop it!

Me: "What a beautiful wedding -"

Dad: We're not even at a church -

Me:  "What a beautiful wedding," says the bridesmaid to the waiter.

Dad: Oh god.

Me: "Oh, but what a shame, what a shame the poor grooms bride is a whore."

Dad: I just wanted you to close the goddamn door.

Me: I chimed in with a "Haven't you people ever heard of closing the goddam door?"