Just Give Me a Reason

Chapter 3

A/N: I dedicated this to Akshaya_1Dlover because she was the first comment and I thank her for that. It means a lot to me. The pic is the Malik family home.

The bed creaked as I bolted from the warm confines to involuntarily purge the too many pints I had with Louis. The taste was putrid as it flowed from my mouth. I slumped on the ground next to the toilet to catch my breath. A flash of Harry appeared in my mind. I sometimes had the bad tendency to drink too much and when we were in college and together he would always be there to rub my back and tell me I would be OK.

What a way to remember him.

I flushed the toilet and made my way back to bed. I couldn't sleep. I kept thinking about Harry calling me. This really was out of nowhere. I loved him still with the same amount of passion as the day we broke up. He was still my everything but in reality he wasn't mine. He was Liam's which was still something hard for me to admit.

I did avoid him and I had a right to. Sure we remained friends but that didn't stop the jolts I got every time he touched me, the heartbreak at seeing every kiss they shared or the pitiful longing I felt at hearing his voice on the phone.

I did keep in contact with Liam and maybe it was a little unfair that I left him out but it was easier for me to keep in their lives without dealing with him directly. I know I said I wanted his news to be about them leaving, but that wasn't true. Him gone was something I didn't want to picture let alone come true. No matter how much I didn't want to admit it he had somehow become my life. I felt pity for myself.

I loved another man's husband.

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I woke to the sun shining in my eyes. I woke everyday at eight. I liked to get a early start on the day so it didn't feel like I wasted it. I must have finally fallen asleep last night. I rubbed the sleep from my eyes and yawned, swinging my legs over the side of the bed. I did my daily morning routine and dressed in a pair of black skinny jeans and my black cotton sweater.

I went downstairs, picking up trash on my way. It looked like I'd had a major party. When the hell did my house get so dirty? I was lucky to have it really. My editing wasn't doing so well and every piece of money I got needed to be saved. I refused to ask my friends or family for the money so I suffered in silence. I was making it.

The shrill ringing of the phone broke me out of my financial woes. I looked at the plastic and sighed. Could it be Harry again? This was the most he has ever called me. Could be Louis. For some reason I was his go to guy to get drunk. Something that didn't sit well with Harry back in college. He hated when we got together and drank. He said we became idiot's and assholes. I was an asshole from the beginning, no need for the beer to bring it out.

"Hello?"

"Zayn!" The voice yelled and I knew exactly who it was. It was hard to mistake a thick Irish voice.

"Niall. What's up man?"

"You know the same. I'm still in my nurse training so.." He had gone to college with us for nursing and we all took the time to tease him for it. He would take it in stride and say it's what he loved to do. I could admire that.

"Yeah I'm doing to. It's been a while since you called." I said.

"I know. This training is no joke but I love it. What are you doing right now? If you're not doing anything come eat with me."

"I can't right now. I have somewhere to be. Hey where's Louis?" Usually when ever they had time off you could catch them together.

"He came home late, piss drunk and woke with the worst hangover ever. After the third time of him throwing his shoes at me I left him alone to eat by myself."