Jaspar One-Shots

Brave

Summary: Joe and Caspar see loads of people coming out and want to do the same, but they are too scared.
Warnings: NONE.

Connor, Troye, Tyler, Ingrid. Just a few names of many of the people that have came out as liking the same gender on YouTube, and there's even more to add to that list as well.

Apart from Joe and Caspar.

Joe and Caspar had been dating for a year now, it had been in private at first for a few months but soon they got the courage to tell their friends. Their friends had been very supportive, and they even threw a party to celebrate.

They both couldn't be happier.
But everyday there was a little nagging voice at the back of their heads, reminding them that when they both stepped outside of their apartment they couldn't hold hands, they couldn't kiss, they couldn't do anything like that.

That was all because of the subscribers. The fans. They didn't want to let them down.

Even though nearly all of their subscribers shipped them together, they were still both terrified to come out. They are both afraid of not being accepted, and getting lots of hate comments and losing subscribers. They may be rich, but their fans is what kept them going. What could split them apart in a second. What could completely change their relationship.

And what bought them together in the first place.
-
One Year Ago:

It was a rainy, cold Wednesday night in London and Joe and Caspar were both currently sat on the sofa watching a film together. Of course, they both weren't watching the film. They were too busy looking at each other, and blushing when either one of them caught them staring.

They both liked each other, or a better way to put it was that they both were absolutely head over heels for each other. Did they know that the other liked them back? They had no idea.
"Do you want dinner?" Joe asked Caspar, sitting up a little to look at Caspar's face. Caspar lent forward and paused the film and quickly stood up, making Joe jump at the sudden movement.

"Pizza! Do we have pizza?" Caspar replied excitedly.
"Aw. Adorable" Joe said automatically, covering his mouth quickly when he realised he said that out loud. Caspar's cheeks instantly turned bright red, and he quickly walked over to the kitchen not knowing what to say. "Yes, we have pizza."

After Joe had put the pizza in the oven, he walked over to Caspar who was now sat back on the sofa. Joe sat closer than he normally would, and they both agreed not to carry on watching the film as they wouldn't hear the pizza and they didn't want to stop and play the film a lot.

So they were forced to talk.

"So, you know the fans..." Caspar trailed off awkwardly, and Joe nodded.
"Yes, I know the subscribers." Joe chuckled.
"Do you know about them like, shipping us together? Like I mean like."
"Caspar stop saying 'like' so much." He laughed. "Is it the only word you know?"

Truth is, it was the only word that was running through his head. He was so nervous.

Caspar just chuckled nervously, and faced Joe.
"You know they want us to be a couple? They already think we are." Caspar said, watching Joe's face twist into a smile. Joe started to get closer to Caspar.

"Then maybe," Joe paused. He was centermeters away from Caspar's face. Both of their hearts were beating out of their chests, the thought of the others lips on theirs making their chest tighten and their heads whirl. "Maybe we should give them what they want."
And with that, Joe leant forward and placed his lips on Caspar's. Caspar instantly kissed back, putting his arms around Joe's waist to bring him closer.

It was like they were floating. Their minds clouded with so many thoughts, each of them slowly becoming more happier as the kiss went on. And the 'what ifs' and the 'is this wrong?' Turned into 'this is happening' and 'I think I love him'.

The kiss was sloppy, and nervous. Like all first kisses were. They pulled away, but only for a split second, to laugh a little. Until they connected their lips again. It was like they were drunk, but they weren't. They were just in love.

When they finally pulled away, they kept eye contact. Both of their cheeks were flushed red, and they were both grinning like fools.

"I'm glad you did that." Caspar said, and Joe smiled.
"I've liked you for a while, everybody noticed apart from you." Joe confessed, his cheeks going even more red. Caspar grabbed his hand.
"I've liked you for a while too, and everybody noticed apart from you too. I can't believe we never noticed."

"Will you be my." Joe paused when he saw Caspar's shocked face.
"Boyfriend?" Caspar finished for him, and Joe nodded.
"That, yes."

-

And that was how, one year ago, Caspar and Joe got together. Though they still may be hiding from everybody apart from their family and friends, they learnt over time to not try and hide it. Of course they wouldn't kiss on camera, but they would sometimes just hold hands, even if it was only for a minute.

And as Caspar and Joe watched yet another coming out video, they both sighed and turned to each other.

Someday they would have the confidence, someday they would be able to kiss whenever and wherever. Someday. It doesn't mean never, it just means not right now. And whether it would be a month, or another year. It didn't matter, as long as they were together. Because over time, they found that if they had each other then things wouldn't seem so bad so more.

The coming out video they were watching ended, and Caspar smiled sadly when he saw a tear running down Joe's face. He wiped it off with his finger, cradled him in his arms and kissed his head.
"Don't worry Joe, one day we will be brave."

"Just like they are."

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