Failure (A Death Note/L Love Story)

Chapter 20

It was scary standing outside of the Los Angeles Men's Prison. I didn't want to see what I knew was waiting for me inside. Grief was still heavy on my heart. I wasn't sure I was prepared.

I took a deep breath before walking inside. After going through the security checks and giving them my ID, I was given my visitor's pass and led to the morgue.

"Hello, I'm Dr. Rolfe. What can I help you with... Miss Harmony?" an older gentleman in a white lab coat greeted me. Harmony was the name I used in America. I was pleased to hear English reaching my ears again.

I explained, "I'm looking for Beyond Birthday. I have to collect his things, and I was wondering if I could say goodbye."

"Of course. If you will follow me, I will show you to him," Dr. Rolfe offered, already walking off. I ignored the dead bodies on the numerous tables. Or tried to. Dr. Role noticed. "There sure is a lot of them, isn't there? Never used to be. Ever since Kira showed up, my work has tripled! My pay has gone up from it."

I stated, "Kira killed Beyond, so you could say I'm not exactly part of his fan club."

He shrugged, "I don't have much of an opinion. I see the terrible things that these people have done, but making them die... I don't quite agree with that, either." No opinion? How long would people just not have an opinion about Kira? Or tried to ignore him?

I spotted my friend on the steel table long before Dr. Rolfe announced, "This is him." A white sheet covered his body. I could see some of the burn scars on his neck and collarbone where pale skin used to be. He was lucky Naomi had put out the fire before it could damage his face. His hair had grown long with all the time being in prison. He had died his hair black for his crimes, but it had grown out so the top of it was its natural dark brown color. His eyes were closed, but I imagined them being their real green, not the black he faked with contacts. His lips were a pale blue.

"What was he doing when he died?" I asked in a whisper.

"He was just sitting in his cell. That was all he did when he wasn't made to be somewhere else, apparently. Must have been a real thinker. He didn't scream or anything like the others when it happened. It must have hurt, but it seemed like he was okay with what was happening. His cellmate didn't even know he was dead until he realized Beyond was slumped over grabbing his chest," he informed me. "I'm terribly sorry for your loss." I nodded to show I was listening. I was afraid my voice would crack if I said anything.

Dr. Rolfe took out a box from underneath the table and said, "Well, there isn't much, but these are all his things. And you wouldn't happen to know anyone else besides yourself he knew whose name started with 'h,' would you?"

I shook my head, calming myself down a bit before I spoke, "No, it's just me." He took something white out of his coat pocket. It was an envelope with "H" scrawled in blue ink on the front. He never did have good handwriting.

"Then, I guess this is for you. I don't know why it just has the first letter of your name on there, but he wasn't a guy who made much sense. He always carried it around with him was what his cellmate said. I found it in his uniform. Most of the guys have written letters to loved ones in case Kira gets them. Guess he jumped on the bandwagon," he joked, handing it to me. I stared at it. "Well, I'll leave you alone."

When I couldn't hear his footsteps anymore, I carefully opened the envelope and removed the folded notebook paper. I opened it up.

Dear H,

If you're reading this, then I'm dead. I guess Kira killed me. I wasn't going to do this, but everyone else around here is, and I thought you deserved to know.

I meant to confuse you the day you visited me in prison. If I couldn't beat L, I didn't see why I couldn't try to trick you. You weren't the one I was trying to outsmart, though. So know that when I told you I loved you, I meant it. I still mean it, even though you're the reason I was caught.

When I said that I wasn't sorry, that meant two different things. One, I wasn't sorry for the things I did. I still want to surpass L. Nothing will ever change that. Two, I'm not sorry I left you. I wasn't going to let you get sucked into this. I wasn't going to let you stop me. Plus, I knew it would be easier for me to leave so you could be the successor than trying to quit. They probably would have guilted me back into it.

If I wasn't dead, I wouldn't have told you any of this. So go kill Kira for making me say this. You're going to make a great L one day.

Goodbye,

BB

Hot tears streaked my face as my hands shook, trying to hold the paper steady. My fingers curled around the edge of the steel table where my friend laid. Damn it, Beyond! I cursed silently.

I never knew any of that. I didn't have a clue, and Kira was the reason he couldn't tell me in person. I had a new reason to stop him.

I didn't care who Kira was. He was going to pay for doing this.