Chapter 8
Cheryl’s POV
I wake up to the sound of water running. I’m confused as to why I’m not comfortable. I feel around me and my confusion grows as I only feel marble floors. I open my eyes and look straight at the bottom of a toilet. I get up slowly, realizing I’m lying on my bathroom floor.
“Sorry, did I wake you? I just really needed to wash the black mascara off my face”. Nicola’s voice makes me turn around, glad I can ask someone what I’m doing on the floor of my bathroom!
“Erm, Nic, why am I…”
“On your bathroom floor? Haha… well… if you don’t remember that, I think you should be able to guess what you were doing all night. How are you feeling?”
“Oh, right”. The vague memory of my regurgitating my dinner enters my mind. “But… wow… I’m so… uncomfortable! You couldn’t have got me into bed afterwards?” I ask her, a little accusingly. There have been plenty of nights where I’ve had to carry Nic to her bed.
“I tried! You kept saying you didn’t deserve a bed, that you deserved the floor. You wouldn’t even let me try to get you up. And to be honest, I don’t think I could’ve balanced us both anyway”. She smiles.
Slowly, my night is replayed in my mind. I remember the dancing, locking eyes with Kimberley, stupid Justin interrupting, seeing him flirt pathetically with her… fighting with her…
“Cheryl… do you remember anything you did?” Nicola asks carefully.
Anything I did? I p!ssed Kimberley off… she ended it. I swallow a lump in my throat as I remember her words. “I’m so done with you”. Like I was a bother to her, an irritation. Was I? Am I?
I suddenly gasp, remembering how I felt after hearing her say that, remembering how Justin’s friend started dancing with me, remembering how I threw myself at him…
I cringe, apparently visibly since Nicola gives me an apologetic smile.
“Did she see…?” I’m almost afraid to ask, thinking even if she didn’t, there’s no way she didn’t find out.
“Yeah… she did”.
As fractions of my actions replay in my head, I inwardly wince at knowing my baby saw them. Yet… wait a minute… she’s not my baby anymore. She broke up with me. I have every right to kiss someone else. I shouldn’t have to feel guilty for that.
“Well… she dumped me… she can’t expect me to be yearning after her…”
“Cheryl! This is Kimberley we’re talking about! Not some ex-boyfriend of yours. I don’t know what happened between you two, but I know you didn’t break up because you stopped loving each other! She was really upset”. Nicola looks at me accusingly.
Crap. She’s totally right. I know that. I nod involuntarily. I even knew while I was making out with… whatever his name is. It was purely to make me feel like I didn’t give a damn about Kimberley’s words. But I did give a damn… I still do. I love her. I don’t think I’ll ever love someone as much as I love her. Why did I have to be so stupid telling her about my doubts?!
“Nic… I don’t want it to be over… I want her back”. I say honestly.
“Yeah, I had a feeling that would be the case… which makes this so much harder…” Her eyes shift from one side of the room to the other. “Chez… Nadine called me just now… apparently Kimba’s agreed to go to dinner with Justin… on a date…”
WHAT. No… she can’t be serious. As I gaze at Nicola words jump back into my memory. “Maybe you DO need to go find Justin and get laid”.
“I wasn’t sure whether or not to tell you…” Nicola’s voice sounds miles away.
“How about I go do exactly that!”
Ohhh… no no no! It’s all my own fault! I actually drove her right into his arms! She knows I didn’t mean it though right? She’s just doing this to get back at me… she doesn’t actually like him. She can’t. Nah… it’s just revenge... I’m sure of it… she doesn’t like him.
Although… they were together so long… longer than we were together, way longer. And she really did seem to be enjoying herself talking to him. She looked at him with such affection. Ugh… the memory makes me sick. She hasn’t looked at me like that in… I don’t know how long. Then again, I guess I haven’t really deserved her affection in a long time. The only times we were intimate in the last month were in the aftermath of our fights. Don’t get me wrong, it was mind-blowing sex. It was hot, desperate… rough. But it’s nothing representative of my feelings for her. And if I’ve missed our sweet, tender, affectionate moments, I have no doubt that she has too.
What if Justin gives her that?
“It really is over isn’t it…?” I ask myself out loud, my breath hitching half-way through the sentence, Nicola already on her way over to pull me into her arms.
