Truthful, Beating Heart

Chapter Two

After my mom broke the news I cried. A lot. Tear after tear slipped out of my useless eyes. My inability to see my surroundings became more unbearable with each passing minute, and more than once, panic, brought on by the suffocating darkness, pinned me to the bed. The only thing that made it better was to squeeze my eyes shut - at least then I could pretend like I'd still be able to open them and see again. 

Once the tears stopped I found myself overwhelmed by a dark cloud of depression. Too sore to move, too shocked to talk and too sad to cry, the nurse mercifully gave me a dose of medication. I slipped into a deep, empty sleep, and I didn't fight it off.

A bright light shined in my eyes and in a split second, my life was changing forever. The world slowed down to a crawl as the mysterious car hit mine. I heard the sickening noise of metal on metal. Squeeling tires rang out in the night air. Glass from my car windows shattered and the glittering stuff, too beautful to belong here, fell like sharp, deadly snowflakes around me. An agonizing pain ripped through my skull and the world went black, leaving the imprint of the shining glass shards on my eyelids.

I woke up to find myself screaming bloody murder. I heard both my parents rush to the bedside. My mother put her hand in mine and squeezed it while Tom stroked my forehead. Both of them soothed me until the beeping slowed down. Beep. Beep. Beep..beep...beep...beep.. I inhaled and exhaled, trying to calm myself down. Knowing I owed both my parent's an explaination I said,

"I had a dream about the accident. A memory I think." All of us were silent when Tom quietly asked,

"Did you see the car Erin?" 

I shook my head. "It was too dark." 

All at once I was flooded with the seriousness of the situation. I was blind, maybe forever. I might never see the sparkling sun reflecting off the lakes again. I would never again see the leaves turn from green to orange in the fall. I'd never watch another movie, or read another book. I would not see myself age, only feel the wrinkles grow deep on my skin. The brilliant blue sky, the sunsets, the rainbows that came after the evening thunderstorms. All of them, never to be seen again by my eyes. Tears streamed down my cheeks as realized how drastically my life had changed in a single instant. I sniffed pathetically and asked my parents the question that haunted my mind. "Who did this to me?" As I waiting for the answer my heart thundered in sync with the machine. Beep...beep...beep.. 

They said, both at the same time, "We don't know."

Depression crashed down on me again and threatened to stay after that. Tom told me that there was no one around to see the accident. The police received an anonymous tip that led them to me but by the time they got there only me and my car were left. The doctors said that I should have died. I was lucky, they said. So why was I sitting around feeling sorry for myself? I refused to talk, refused to eat. I slept and awoke each time only to find that when I opened my eyes only darkness was waiting for me.

 Once the x-ray results came in, the doctor explained that, besides my eyes, I had also fractured my left ankle in two places and fractured my right knee cap. There was also a large cut on my forehead, presumably from the impact of my head on whatever solid object it hit. He also said that I would need to stay in the hospital for at least another week to make sure that I didn't have permanent damage done to my brain, other than my eye sight. After he left, I slipped into my unresponsive state, keeping my eyes closed and torturing myself with memories of pretty things that I'd never see again.

After hopeless attempts at conversation, my parents went for a walk to find something to eat and, although they didn't say so, to get away from my silence. Not long after they left I heard footsteps at my door. I kept my eyes closed and my back facing the door, hoping to be mistaken for being asleep. I wasn't so lucky. I heard a unfamiliar male voice speak to me,

"Hi Erin!" It said, much too cheerfully. I cocked one ear toward the door and asked shortly,

"Who are you?" I was very cranky and I wasn't going to try and hide it. He said,

"My name's Tony Walters. I'm not sure if you'll remember me." A blonde haired, freckled face flashed through my mind at the mention of his name. I remembered him all right. "We were neighbors as kids," he continued, "and I heard you were in an accident." We had been more than just neighbors. We had been best friends. We were practically connected at the hip and then, one day, he just left, leaving my feeling heartbroken and abandoned. I hadn't seen him since the fourth grade, so why on earth was he here? Something told me that it wasn't just a spontaneous act of kindness that prompted his visit. My trust, like it always had, disappeared just like my eyesight.