Playground [Frerard AU]

THIRTEEN

"Do you think he liked the kiss, Herc?" I gloomily asked my cat's indifferent face. He didn't answer, instead deciding to headbutt me and smush his face against mine. "You're so weird," I huffed at him. Hercules looked at me as though to say 'says the one lying on his stomach on his bedroom floor talking to a damn cat.'

Are cats smart enough to think we're weird? Was Hercules aware that I was full to the brim of regret and confusion and sadness as I lay there on the carpet for upwards of an hour? Or was he just bored that I wasn't doing anything with him?

"Should I phone him?"

Hercules shrugged. No he didn't, I'm lying; he just headbutted me again. Thankfully he didn't have a very heavy head so I wasn't given the shame of a pet-induced concussion. Stupid violent cat.

"I guess I should then," I thought aloud, watching Hercules saunter over to my guitar and rub his nose against it. "You're no help," I huffed at him. He ignored me and kept making acquaintance with my guitar.

I groaned into the carpet until I ran out of air. What if Gerard didn't answer? Or he didn't like guys? What if it was all a mistake and now he hated me? Hell, I didn't even know that I liked guys. I still didn't know. The thought have never really occurred to me and the more I thought about it the more confused I was, for God's sake.

Jesus, this was all so damn cliché. Why the fuck did I even care? Why does anyone care? I sat up and punched my mattress moodily.

"Fuck this," I muttered, feeling myself pout like a child. Or Buffy the vampire slayer; she pouted a lot.

The sudden buzzing of my phone yanked me out of my sulk and I answered the call without checking who it was from.

"Hey, Frank," my father greeted me quietly, sheepishly. "How's it going?"

I didn't say anything. My chest was now so tight I could barely breathe, let alone speak.

"Frank?"

"Hi, uh, dad," I managed out eventually. "It's, um, it's fine."

My dad was nodding, I could tell. "Good, good. So, uh, listen, son. I have something to tell you, but I shouldn't really be telling you so don't mention it to Marisol."

I scoffed. Like I'd ever talk to my stepmother; she was a fucking bitch. And not just because she didn't let my father talk to me or visit me or write to me.

"Right, what is it?"

He sighed. "We're moving to America, Frank. Me, Marisol, and the kids. We're flying over to Pennsylvania next week."

Now I was the one nodding my head continuously. I pressed my lips together, feeling myself involuntarily sitting on my bed as though I needed support. I didn't need support, I told myself, just like how I don't need my dad moving back to the same country as me.

I swallowed. "Do you not like Spain?" It was kind of a joke, even though it was a pathetic one. "The heat get to you?"

A nervous chuckle crackled down the line. This call must have been costing him a fortune by now. "Nah, Marisol's work got transferred."

I didn't say anything, partly because I wanted to cost the idiot as much money as possible.

"Would you want to come out and visit me? I'll pay for your travel."

"Would she be okay with that?" I meant Marisol. I rolled my eyes, my father could be so stupid sometimes.

He paused. "Well, we won't tell her."

I sighed. "Right, I'll think about it. But I have to get back to doing chores now, dad. You know Grandma."

"Right, yes, of course, son. Uh, do me a favour and don't tell her about it right now either, alright, sport?"

"Yeah, dad. Bye," I answered, falling onto my back on the bed once I'd hung up the phone. I wasn't going to think about visiting him, and I think we both knew that. Or, at least, I knew that. He probably wasn't able to tell since, really, we were practically strangers to one another.

-

"Are you okay, love?" My grandma put her hand on mine on the kitchen table and I looked up to see her worried frown. I hated to make her worry, she didn't deserve to worry about some introverted teenager.

"Of course," I forced my mouth into a smile. She narrowed her eyes a bit at me through the dim glow of the ceiling light. I stared up at the lamp. "I think I'll change that lightbulb; I can bare-"

"Frank," grandma squeezed my hand and I looked back at her in guilt of ignoring her. "I'll get the bulb later. What's wrong, honey? Do you want to tell me?"

My grandma was a dear, she really was. A right angel. I smiled genuinely for a moment at how much she actually cared about me and my wellbeing, before remembering what had been bothering me. I decided to tell her, against my glimmer of a father's wishes. He wasn't around, why should I care what he wanted? Besides, he had married Marisol so his judgment obviously wasn't the best.

"My dad called, said he's coming back, " I blurted out all in a rush.

Grandma, stunned, gripped my fingers more tightly as her mouth opened and closed like a goldfish.

"To Jersey?! With that bitch of a wife?"

I grinned, without meaning to, at her cursing. "Do you not like her either, grandma?"

Grandma chuckled. "Not in the least; she's a right piece of work. And your father isn't the most dedicated of men nowadays."

"Do I have to go and visit him? When he comes back? They're moving to Pennsylvania and he asked me to fly over." I asked, hesitant.

She frowned again. "Do you want to?"

"No."

"Then no, you don't have to. You don't have to do anything you don't want to, Frankie."

I smiled widely at her, squeezing her fingers like she had done with mine. "Except SATs."

She laughed and tapped my cheek twice with her hand. "You're a good boy, Frank. Even if your hair is too long." She stood and began clearing the table, scooping up multiple dishes at once with complete ease as I fumbled to help. "Now, when your dad calls again, give the phone straight to me and- Oh! I just remembered! Donald Way called, said his son seemed off and that you two were friendly. Maybe you should go down and see him? What was his name? Gerard?"

"Yeah," I mumbled, "Gerard..."

-

i feel like i use loads of scottish/british phrases that could sound off when coming from an american character so if there's anything that really should be changed please tell me!!
-Jamie