Fears

Kenophobia

Kenophobia - Fear of voids or empty space

Thursday December 12, 2014 (Date In Story)

Phoebe's POV

I awaken shaking with tears streaming down my face. I sit up wiping my face trying to control my crying, this doesn't work though. It's hard to stop crying when you don't even know what you're crying about in the first place. I suspect it had to do with a dream of mine, no not a dream a nightmare.

I close my eyes, briefly getting images from my dream. The one that stands out the most is my father on his knees next to my mother, blood pooling around her as his tears fall down his face. My slightly controlled crying unleashes itself. Tears fall down my face at a rapid pace as I think about my parents and what had happened to them.

As I continue crying I faintly hear scratching on the other side of my bedroom door. I look up at my alarm clock through tear blurred eyes. The clock read that it was just after two a.m. I slowly get up out of bed, walk toward my door while wiping my eyes. I open my bedroom door to find Jasper, Charlie, and Raven sitting in front of the doorway, I move aside to let them. When I do so they all run in and jump up onto my bed. I close my door and make my way to my bed. I get in and fall asleep with the labs cuddling next to me.

****

When I wake again it's from my alarm clock going off. I turn off the alarm, I sit up and look around me to see the labs all cuddling together. I give a mental aww before getting up and walking into the bathroom. I look into the mirror to see myself looking horrible. My face is sticky with tear and my eyes are red and puffy from my crying, I sigh before turning away. I take off my clothes and climb into the shower turning it on as hot as it would go. As I wash myself I'm on autopilot. I just stand there trying not to feel, close myself off from the world and desperately try not to think.

Once I'm out of the shower I don't feel any better like I hoped I would. Usually hot showers fix my bad moods, but not today. I walk out and into my closet. I blindly choose my outfit for the day, I'm faintly aware that I'm wearing sweatpants. I grab my bag and walk downstairs, leaving my bedroom door open for the labs that still lay in my bed asleep.

It doesn't take me very long to get to school. Though as I walked through the hallways I tried to stay focused on the task at hand, but I keep slipping into autopilot. I hear people shout around me and some at me for not watching where I was going. But I didn't have the energy to say anything back nor acknowledge them. I just keep walking, eventually I make it to my art class.

I sit down next to Scarlett. I don't say anything though, I just pull out my sketchbook and pencils. I can feel Scarlett staring at me, but I just ignore her. I hear Mrs.Sanchez talking to the class but I don't pay attention. I draw on my sketchbook, but I don't really pay attention to that either.

Suddenly I'm startled by the bell ring, announcing that class is over. I look down at my sketchbook to see what I've drawn only to gasp and have tears fill my eyes. I had drawn my dream, I had drawn my father kneeling over my dead mother. I closed the book and shoved it in my bag. I stand up I hear Scarlett saying my name and asking me if I was okay, but I don't answer. I walk out of the room and to my next class.

****

I sigh out in relief when I hear the bell ring once again announcing that the school day is over. I slowly stand and gather my things. With the same slow pace I walk through the school hallways to the parking lot. I had just stepped out of the school when I hear Tristan call my name.

I stopped moving, I didn't walk away when he had finally reached me. I was to emotionally drained to put up a fight. I stare at the ground and see his feet come into my line of vision when he stands in front of me. I feel Tristan place his hands on my shoulders like he was afraid I would run away.