Calum was laying on the motel bed smoking, Ashton was leaning over the balcony, beer in hand, Michael was laying on the floor, a plastic bag of ecstasy spilled on the floor next to his limp hand and a blissed out expression on his face, and I was sitting in the middle of the floor, fiddling around with the floral patterned pistol the boys and I had saved up to buy. That meant a month without booze for Ashton, cigarettes for Calum, and drugs for Michael, not to mention all the headaches I got from all the whining the boys game me about their withdrawal symptoms. Ashton was sick for a week and we couldn't leave Florida as fast as we wanted to, and we were almost caught by the cops, once in a drug store, and the other when I went out alone to the grocery story to get microwave dinners, something we had learned to survive on.
"You okay there, buddy?" Calum asked from the bed, laughing at the sight of just Michael's legs sticking out and the rest of his body hidden from his view.
Michael laughed in a high pitched sort of way, kicking his feet up onto the end of the bed. "I feel fucking amazing." He said, blinking his hazy eyes. "But these jaw clenches are getting to me."
"You gotta lay off the drugs for a while. You'll grind your teeth too hard and then you'll whine about the pain all day tomorrow." Ashton said, walking into the room and sliding the door shut.
Michael huffed and tossed the bag in Ashton's direction. "Try one. You'll see why I'm not stopping. This is the best high I've had for months."
Ashton tore open the bag and tossed a green pill into his mouth, jumping on the bed next to Calum and wrapping an arm around his waist.
"Cal?" Michael asked, holding a pill out for the tan lad who was making rings with his smoke.
"Nah." Calum waved him off. "I've got some weed saved for later that we can break out once the street lights go on. It's too light out to smoke on the balcony."
Ashton groaned and buried his face in a pillow. "How long until this shit kicks in?"
"About thirty minutes." Michael answered, earning another groan from Ashton. He tossed the bag at my feet. "Try one, princess. It's fucking amazing."
"Wh-what does it do?" I asked, examining a pill in my hand. "I've never done this before."
"Well first you get really really happy and then you just feel so fucking buzzed and you practically love everyone you see. Everyone's fucking beautiful and you just wanna make out with someone and shit. Lasts about three to five hours, but the only problem is that your jaw does this weird thing where it clenches up sometimes, and that makes blowjobs pretty hard-"
"Fuck it, toss me one." Calum said, opening his mouth for me to toss a pill in his direction and for him to catch it perfectly in his mouth. "You lame shits, I can't believe I'm doing this with you."
Ashton stumbled over to me and sat down directly behind me, pulling me onto his lap and taking a pill from the bag. He was obviously a little more than tipsy. "Here." He said, holding a pill up to my lips. "Just let it dissolve. Then wait a while and it gets good, but then it gets great."
I carefully took the pill in my mouth, letting it slowly dissolve in my mouth as Ashton smiled into my neck. "It's starting to kick in. Hey, Mike, how much longer do you reckon you've got left?"
"Probably about half an hour. Toss me another one. This one didn't last as long." Michael said, catching another pill in his hand and setting it on the floor next to his hand. "I ain't fucking moving." He mumbled after trying to reach the table next to him.
About twenty minutes later the sun was setting and I was laying in the middle of the floor giggling my ass off because Calum said something not even remotely funny.
"Yeah, he's totally gone." Michael laughed at me. I glanced up at him and he suddenly look a little different- prettier in a way.
Calum and Ashton were immersed in their own conversation, and fuck, they looked hot too.
Calum nudged Ashton's shoulder and nodded towards me. "He's giving us heart eyes." He mumbled not-so quietly.
"I dunno- I just- you're so- oh shit- you're all so hot-" I stuttered.
Ashton laughed lightly from the bed and gestured me to sit next to him. "Feel good yet?" He asked. I nodded and stuck out my tongue, showing him that the pill had long dissolved.
Michael popped another pill in his mouth and climbed onto the bed as well. "It's only been twenty minutes and you're already high? Damn, you really are a lightweight." He said, ruffling my hair.
"No 'm not. I'm pretty sure that doesn't apply for drugs." I said, falling onto Calum's lap, who was too busy playing with Michael's fingers and kissing Ashton's neck.
Ashton's hand crept up to my thigh, slowly making his way up. "We should fuck." He said straightforwardly. "Not to be informal or anything."
"Of course." Calum snickered. "Four killers on drugs and fucking is totally formal."
"Shut up. You know what I meant." Ashton said, shoving Calum's side. "Unless you don't want me to fuck you-"
"Of course I do." The tan boy said quickly, grabbing Ashton's face and chastely kissing him.
"There's obviously going to be no fucking going on if I'm not involved." Michael interjected. "Other people are in this room as well."
Ashton shrugged and pulled off his shirt. "I'm down. Boys?"
"Sure, why not?" I said. "There's nothing better to do, right?"
Michael flopped down on the bed and pulled his own shirt off, throwing it at Ashton. "Right then. Just proper fucking." He laughed. "I call fucking Lukey."
"What if I wanted to?" Asked Ashton.
Calum then took his own shirt off and crawled over to Michael. "Then you can just switch. I don't care as long as I get fucked hard."
Later that night, when all the drugs wore off and the lights were out we were all tangled together in bed and I could practically feel the love between our intertwining limbs. There were knees digging into my back and hands tangled in my hair, but I didn't mind much. If this isn't love then god damn was is?
